Tifa's Betrayal
by BabyKay47
Summary: How does Vincent cope when he finds history repeating itself?
1. Tifa's Blood

Standard Dislcaimer: I don't own FF7, Vincent, Tifa, etc.

A/N: Updated 7.31.12 I started this story six years ago and I mean to finish it. In order to accomplish this goal I have gone back and rewritten some parts and added some more. I've got about 20 chapters written, and intend to update once a week. So if you read the original, please come back and read it again, and if this is the first time, please enjoy! Any feedback would be appreciated.

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**Chapter 1: Tifa's Blood**

Vincent could remember the first time he smelled Tifa's blood. It was immediately after he had joined Avalanche's party in Nibelheim after awakening from a thirty year slumber. The Nibel mountains were filled with dangerous creatures mutated from their exposure to mako. The wolves, which had always been dangerous in their own right, were no exception.

It was a lone wolf, deranged and frothing at the mouth that snuck up on them and attacked. It struck at Tifa first who stood off by herself lost in thought, no doubt, still troubled by the ghost-like quality of the town that was hers in sight down to the smallest detail, but was nothing more than a Shinra cover up. Its sharp teeth shredded the delicate exposed skin of one of her long legs releasing a sharp metallic odor into the air that Vincent immediately identified as blood—Tifa's blood—and the crazed beast would have tried for more if a simultaneous kick from a hard metal-tipped boot and an precisely aimed bullet to the head from Vincent's Quicksilver had not quickly picked it off.

Cloud had anxiously rushed to her side to see if she was all right, feeling somewhat guilty that he too had been so lost in his own thoughts of their shared hometown that he had not been able to protect her. But Tifa had already touched the glowing green restore materia orb on one gloved hand and the jagged tear of bloodied flesh magically healed in a verdant haze. "I'm all right," she told several pairs of concerned eyes, and they all could see that she was. So they continued on the journey chasing after the black-caped man they believed to be Sephiroth.

One morning several days later, Vincent's heightened olfactory skills picked up the same iron scent emanating from the tent that Tifa shared with Yuffie and Aeris. He watched her slowly climb out of the tent with a soft groan and a small hand unconsciously resting on her stomach. He saw her go into the woods in the area they had marked off as the latrine area.

When she returned a few minutes later, Vincent could see from her expression that she was still feeling unwell, and smell the blood that clung to her body. For long moments he debated whether he should go up to her and find out what was wrong. He could not imagine that Tifa would keep it hidden if something were seriously wrong with her, but there was a part of him that desperately needed reassurance from her. He did not want to think about why it was that the dark-haired young woman that he had only known for a short period mattered to him so much already.

Having no desire to see her pass out or worse from an improperly treated injury, Vincent decided to walk up to Tifa as she poured herself a drink of water from one of the canteens. "Are you all right, Tifa?" Vincent asked, his concerned crimson eyes glued to her face, which seemed paler than usual. She was obviously trying to conceal her pain.

"Yes! I'm fine! There's no need to be concerned," she tried to reassure him, but her averted eyes told him that she was hiding something.

He stepped in closer and told her in low whisper, "I know you're hiding something. And I can smell…blood…on you…" Vincent was reasonably sure that the others in the party were aware of his enhanced abilities, as he had more than once warned them of impending danger due to his scotopic vision, and they had become acquainted with his transformation into the horrifying Galian Beast during battle. "Are you sure that you have not injured yourself beyond the capabilities of your restore materia?"

Tifa's mortified gaze flew to his face then and her pale cheeks reddened with embarrassment. "You can…smell my…blood?" she croaked out.

"Yes. It concerns me."

"I'm not injured, Vincent! I assure you. My…bleeding…" she let out in a horrified whisper, "is completely normal. Nothing you should be concerned with!" Then she spun away, putting down the mess kit, and darted into the woods until she was out of sight. But he could still smell her, and the pungent scent of her blood. Vincent stood there perplexed trying to think of reason why she should be bleeding so steadily, and then it hit him.

"Don't worry about the smell, you'll get used to it." Nanaki tried to reassure him, understanding where he was coming from since he too had a sensitive nose.

Vincent silently regarded him for a few moments and then nodded. "There are so many things I have to become accustomed to…" He looked down at his prosthetic left hand which wasn't really a hand anymore, but rather a claw. He studied how the gold mythril reflected the morning light, reminding him again that he was not quite human. Not anymore.

Vincent wasn't ever able to ignore the smell of Tifa. He could use her unique odors to gage her mood. She was usually the most relaxed and comfortable when her hair was clean and smelled of rainwater and shampoo. He could tell when she was afraid by the sudden sharpness of her sweat. And he smelled her sadness through her silent tears. He was surprised one day by the scent of her arousal when he knew that it wasn't the blond warrior who made her feel that way.

And now when she bled it told him of her sadness and made him feel guilty again for the sacrifice that she made to be with him. She would always reassure him that she loved him and that it didn't matter that she would never be the mother to his children, but his anger would burst into flame anew at the reminder of what Hojo had taken from him, and in turn had taken from Tifa.

Every time that Tifa's blood ran freely Vincent knew that he was one day closer to losing her.


	2. Vincent's Secret

**Chapter 2: Vincent's Secret**

He was so in love with her. He wanted to marry her. He knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life, or at least the rest of hers as the case may be, with her. But he dreaded the thought of asking her because he knew it would be unfair to ask her without telling her the truth. And he knew what her answer would be if he told her.

He had deluded himself into believing that things could continue the way they had been. He spent more and more time at her apartment, and when they were apart, he couldn't wait to see her again. But he wanted more. He didn't want to be a secret anymore. He didn't want to wake up in bed without her. He wanted to see her every day and claim her as his own for the whole world to see.

But he knew that the only way that he could ask her was if he told her about the secret that he'd been keeping to himself; a burden that was getting harder and harder to carry.

They didn't talk about the future much. Perhaps she felt that she'd said it all before with another man, and look how that had turned out. Perhaps even she felt that they had no future, but as long as they didn't talk about it, they wouldn't have an ending either. Whatever the case may be, Vincent was beginning to imagine a future with her, and he believed, no hoped, that she was beginning to see a future with him. They had known each other for three years and been romantically involved for one. But most importantly, Vincent felt happy, and he thought she was, too.

He was scared, though. There was still a part of him that was waiting for Cloud to come back, thank Vincent for standing in for him while he was away, like he was simply a placeholder in the line to Tifa's heart, and then take her away from him for good. But if they were married…then Tifa would have made her choice. The sanctity of marriage would protect him, prevent her from forsaking her vows, tie her to him forever…who was he kidding? He knew better than anyone how easy it was to seduce someone into breaking their vows. Hadn't he done it himself?

No. If he married her, it would be sacred, but it would not be a safeguard against everything that could tear apart their marriage. Including Cloud. Maybe even especially Cloud. But he still wanted it. He wanted to see her in a white gown. Watch her walk down the aisle with a beatific smile on her face. Wanted to hear her speak her vows to him in a clear, sweet voice. And he wanted to say his vows to her, and place his ring on her finger. There was something very primal about the act. And more than anything he wanted to kiss her from that day on until the day she died.

And even if he lived forever, and was forced to watch her get older and weaker, and eventually die, even as he continued on agelessly, he knew that he wanted to be with her for as long as he could. And if he could, he would give her everything in his power to make her happy. Everything but one thing.

She never mentioned it, but he knew how heartbroken she'd felt when Marlene and Barrett had finally returned to Corel. For a little while there, right after Meteor had been destroyed, she, Cloud, Barrett, Marlene and Elmyra had lived together as a little family. Tifa had been the only mother the little girl had ever known, and Tifa loved her like she was her daughter. But Barrett and Marlene were the first to leave the house in Kalm after they'd been able to evacuate all the people out of the Midgar ruins. Barrett had needed to return to his hometown and beging to rebuild there, and he could not go without his daughter. Then Elmyra had left because Cloud asked her to. He found the memories and the guilt he felt whenever he looked at Aeris' mother to be just too unbearable, and she had agreed, had moved into a newly built senior citizen's community where she had been able to find some of her old neighbors from Sector Five. And finally, Cloud had left, too, leaving her to an empty house full of the memories of a time when she had had a family.

He knew that the one thing she wanted desperately was a family of her own. Children that belonged to her and could never be taken away. And he knew that children were the one thing he could never give her.

How could he tell her? How could he tell her that he was even less of a man than she already thought he was. She already knew that he was a freak of nature. She had cried over his scars, come into contact with his demons, seen the inhumanly fast way his body healed, and still stayed with him. But could he push her just that one step further? Would it be the final straw that broke the chocobo's back? Should he not even bother to tell her and just one day walk out and never come back? Take the coward's way out, and not give her the chance to walk away from him? No, he couldn't do that. He couldn't do that to her, not when he knew how much she had already lost. But he couldn't tell her either.

He waffled in indecision for weeks. But the longer he stayed with her, the harder it was for him to tell her the truth. He couldn't give her up, no matter how much he tried, no matter that he knew that she would probably be better off with someone who could give her what she wanted. Someone like Cloud, who he knew she would always have strong feelings for.

Eventually, Tifa noticed that something was bothering Vincent, that he was quieter and more withdrawn than usual.

"Vincent, I know that something is wrong. Can you please just tell me, so I can help you?" she ended up asking him one night as they were having dinner. "Whatever it is we can work it out together," she assured him, smiling sweetly. Ever cheerful, his Tifa was. And it was his undoing.

He shook his head involuntarily. "I can't tell you," he whispered hoarsely, past a lump in his throat.

Tifa's smile slowly began to fade. "Yes, you can, Vincent. Just tell me. You're starting to scare me."

"Please don't make me tell you."

Tifa pushed herself away from the table and stood up so she could pull him into her arms. "Whatever it is you can tell me. You have to know that Vincent. I love you."

He grasped on to her tightly, holding on for dear life as if it was the last time he'd see her. Then taking a deep shuddering breath, he let out, "I want to marry you, Tifa."

Tifa's mouth opened in shock, but when she looked into his troubled eyes she began to smile. "Is this what has been bothering you? You're afraid I'll say 'no?'" She chuckled softly, and then kissed him gently on the mouth. "You can be such a silly man sometimes…of course, I will—"

"I can't have children, Tifa," he said flatly, cutting her off.

"What?"

"I can't get you pregnant."

"You mean, you…how?"

"Hojo."

"I…need to sit down…" She pulled Vincent's arms from around her and went to sit down on the nearest chair.

Vincent watched her as she swept her fingers through her hair as if she could find answers in the long strands.

"Are you sure?" was the first question she asked after a long, uncomfortable silence.

Vincent nodded. "I didn't know the extent of what Hojo had done to me, and I wanted to protect you in case he had given me a…disease, so I had myself tested after we…began to have sexual relations."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" Tifa demanded.

"When should I have told you? At first I wasn't even completely sure what your feelings were for me. And then, when I thought you loved me, I was too afraid to tell you; too afraid that you would think less of me. I've tried to tell you a hundred times, but I just couldn't…Please forgive me."

Tifa sighed, and shook her head. "No, I'm the one that should be apologizing. You were the one who was mutilated and tortured, and if you never wanted to tell me all the ways that you had been hurt, then that is your right."

"Not if it affects you and our future. I understand if you don't want to be with me anymore because of this…"

"Vincent, you can't believe that I would love you any less because of this. It wasn't your fault. And I love you."

"I love you, too, Tifa."

"But I need to think about it."

"I understand."

"You must think I'm terribly selfish right now."

"I could never think that of you, Tifa."

"I feel selfish. I can't help but think how wonderful and beautiful it is that you want to marry me, but I can't say yes immediately because I'm thinking about the babies I know that I'll never have now. It makes me want to resurrect Hojo just so that I can painfully dismember his body and kill him again."

"I feel the same way sometimes. But I've had longer to become accustomed to the idea. You know, there are other options."

"I know, but I can't even think about it right now. I just want to cry for you, and me, and all the little dark-haired angels I've been imagining in my head." And she was crying, and her tears tore Vincent to pieces. He'd never wanted to bring her pain, yet here he was. He reached out to grab her hand, which was resting on the table. He wasn't sure if his touch would be welcome or not, but she didn't pull away. She bowed her head, her forehead resting on her forearm, so that he couldn't see her tears, as she valiantly tried to get control of her emotions. "I'm so sorry, Vincent. I don't know what has come over me. It was just a silly dream. We had never even talked about getting married, let alone children."

"It's only natural." His voice was a gentle murmur, perfectly accompanying the soft stroke of his thumb up and down on the skin between her thumb and forefinger where their hands were clasped together. He simply held her as her tears flowed freely, and then she took a shaky breath, and lifted up her eyes to his.

"Hold me," she pleaded, and then he was picking her up, and carrying her up the stairs to her bedroom, where he made love to her as if it were the last time.

When it was over, and she was lying in his arms, she let out a little giggle that startled him from his dark reverie. "What is it that tickles your fancy so?" he asked.

"I was just thinking," she started, and giggled again. "I-I was just thinking that at least we'll never have to worry about not having a condom again." It brought a smile to her face to remember how embarrassed Vincent had been because he had forgotten to buy condoms the first time they made love. She had blushingly informed him that she had already purchased some and that he needn't worry. Then she sat up and slapped him playfully on the chest. "Hey! How long have you known this? I could have saved a fortune on birth control."

Vincent stiffened at her reproach. "I didn't realize it was such a financial burden on you. I apologize," Vincent replied stoically. "And I would be happy to reimburse you for the cost."

Tifa laughed again. "I'm just kidding, Vincent. I do like it because it gives me more control over my body. But it will be a relief not to worry about taking a pill every morning anymore."

Vincent was surprised, but heartened by her nonchalant attitude. "Does that mean you want to continue our relationship?"

"I had thought you had just proposed to me earlier. Or do you mean to take it back?" Tifa asked teasingly.

"No." Vincent shook his head vehemently. "If you will have me, I am yours."

"As am I." Tifa smiled, and then she leaned down to kiss him.


	3. Tifa's Guilt

A/N: It's a bit disappointing that after six years and an update with a brand new chapter, (and hopefully improved material,) I haven't gotten any reviews. However, I do appreciate that the majority of the about 50 readers who clicked on the first chapter went on to read the second. So maybe some of you do actually like my story...? But I won't know unless you tell me... (^_^;)

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**Chapter 3: Tifa's Guilt**

When Tifa came home at her usual time, she put down her purse on the table next to the mail that Vincent had considerately left out for her to leaf through. She hung up her coat in the closet like she always did, and Vincent tenderly kissed her in welcome like he always did, only this time she turned her face away so that his lips only caressed a fair cheek instead of warm lips. But it didn't necessarily bother him that she was obviously avoiding him.

"Did you go to the gym?" Vincent asked.

Startled, Tifa finally looked up at him. "No. Why do you ask?"

"You seem tired. And your hair smells like shampoo."

"Oh, yes! I…I did take a shower," she stuttered. "But I…ah…not because I went to the gym. You know how sweaty I can get working at the bar." She refused to look up into his eyes again.

Vincent knew that she was lying, but he couldn't possibly imagine why.

After dinner, Tifa took another shower and took a long time drying her hair. Normally she took her showers in the morning and would let the wet strands dry over the day. Vincent wanted to ask her why she felt the need to shower again, but then she came out of the bathroom wearing a revealing negligee he had never seen before and his question was forgotten. The only thing he could think about was how much he loved, needed, and wanted this woman.

But when the haze of passion disappeared and he lay tightly encircled in her embrace, Vincent could tell that something was still bothering Tifa. As a Turk, he had been quite skilled in the art of deception, and even though it had been decades since he had taken up that occupation, he could tell that she was hiding something. But she was allowed to have a few secrets. He certainly had some of his own; mostly nightmares of his past that he did not want to burden her with. And he trusted that if something were really wrong, she would confide in him.

After several weeks went by, he began to suspect. But he couldn't bring himself to ask her about it. And there was a part of him that didn't want to know. A part that wanted to pretend that nothing had happened and everything was the same. Because he knew that once she told him the truth, everything would change. Nothing would be the same.

Then one morning he awoke to the sound of her retching, and he knew he could wait no longer for her to confess.

He walked in as she was brushing her teeth, but did not say anything. Only waited.

She rinsed her mouth and then turned to him. "Good morning, Vincent," she greeted him with a wan smile, trying to pretend that this was an ordinary morning in their household and she wasn't carrying a secret.

"Are you pregnant?" he asked her, his tone flat, emotionless, inflectionless.

"What?" Tifa looked completely surprised.

"You're late. You're never late." _Had it not even occurred to her, yet?_ But Vincent knew. The changes in her body had been subtle, but the signs were there, especially to someone who had always been attuned to her as he was. He thought in some ways he knew her better than she knew herself. He knew every sigh, every expression on her face, every movement, every touch, every scent, and in recent weeks her skin had begun to glow, and her breasts that had always been well-endowed, had become almost imperceptibly fuller, the nipples darker and more sensitive when he touched her.

"But you know that I…can't get pregnant…" Still in denial she was, and that didn't surprise Vincent. He knew what it cost her to hope, and how one day she had tucked it away some place safe inside her so that the pain of not having that which she desired wouldn't be unbearable. That was the day she had broached the subject of adoption. There were still many children who had lost families during the world crisis and they could use a good home with them. But adoption took time and so they were still childless.

Or at least, he was. "I know that it is not possible for me to father your children…"

Tifa let his words sink in for a few moments as she cast her eyes downward. Knowing that there was no use hiding the truth any longer, she asked simply, "How long have you known?" She closed her eyes in shame.

"Positively? Not until this very moment." And it was at that very moment that the pain of her betrayal hit him full on. It grabbed his chest and squeezed. He leaned against the door and just tried to remember how to breathe.

She reached out to touch him, to comfort him despite being the reason for his current pain, but faltered when she saw him unconsciously draw back from her approaching hand as if her touch would burn him. She let her hand fall to her side. Maybe it would. "Vincent, will you believe me if I tell you how sorry I am?" she asked tearfully.

He shook his head slowly. "Don't be. At least not on my account…I always knew that you still loved…him…I had only hoped that you could come to love me a portion of as much as you loved him."

"I do love you!" she cried out, her tears falling unabashedly, leaving streaks down her pale but luminous cheeks. "I'm so sorry for hurting you. Gods, Vincent, I was such a fool; I won't even try to insult you by offering an explanation or even an excuse. I understand if you hate me, but I don't think I can bear it if you didn't love me anymore because I love you more than you can possibly understand, and I need you."

Again, he shook his head. "I could never hate you."

Selfishly not caring what her touch would do to him, she launched herself into his arms and sobbed brokenly. "Oh, but you should. I'm such a horrible person. I've ruined your trust, knowing how heartbroken you were after Lucrecia. And to do it in the exact same way…"

Unable to help himself, he wrapped his arms around her and sunk to the ground with her between his legs, lightly stroking her hair. He could never bear to see her cry, and her tears soaking through his shirt pierced his heart as well. He steadily rocked her and crooned to her as if she were a small child, until her tears quieted. After many long moments of silence except for her occasional hiccups, he let out a heavy hearted sigh. "I think it's for the best."

"How can you say that?" she asked incredulously, pulling away from his embrace.

"I know how much you want children. And I couldn't be the one to give them to you. Now you can have everything you've always wanted."

"You think this will give me the perfect opportunity to get back together with Cloud, don't you?"

"It seems as if you've already gotten back together."

She flinched at the harshness of his tone, but accepted his censure. "I deserve that. But it couldn't possibly be any farther from the truth. He's…he's not coming back. Not for me. Not for my child. He could have run himself through with his sword for all I know. It's his only way to meet Aeris…" She stopped there thinking that she had made her point clear, but wanting to emphasize the truth of what had happened, she stated, "It was only once."

"I see."

"You think that I'm only with you because I can't be with Cloud? Well, I'm not," she stated firmly, confidently. "And I hope that someday you'll be able to believe me. I know you did once."

"I don't think I can let you hurt me again."

"What do you mean?"

"I can't stay here."

"You're leaving? You're not even going to try to work things out?"

"I'm sorry."

"No, I'm the one that's sorry." Her voice shook with her despair.

He stood up leaving her sitting on the cold tile to stare after him despondently as he walked out of the bathroom and into the closet. Grabbing a duffle bag he began to stuff his things into it. When he returned for his toothbrush and razor, he saw that she was crying again in earnest. He tried to ignore her, but before he could leave she grabbed his wrist and pulled him down into her arms, embracing him, grasping his hair, pressing her lips to his forcefully until he responded. He buried his prosthetic left hand into her hair, and pulled on it until her head fell back exposing her neck. His mouth went there, tickling the sensitive area as his other hand roamed her body, feeling her rib cage beneath her nightgown, and then grabbing a full breast and squeezing just as he bit down softly on her neck causing her to cry out with surprise at his marking her with his teeth as if he were trying to posses her. Then his mouth kissed a trail up her neck to her chin and face, tasting the saltiness of her tears. Finally, unable to ignore her pouting lips a moment longer, his tongue swept into her mouth, tasting her, claiming her, ravishing her as if he were trying to commit the feel of her to memory. She tasted like mint toothpaste, and something sweeter that was distinctly unique, something that only she tasted like, and he knew that he never wanted to stop. It had always been like that for him. From the first moment that she'd consented to kiss him he'd been a goner. Would there ever be a moment when he didn't want her, didn't need her, didn't love her? He supposed he would have to find out.

When he finally pulled back, for his sanity, for his resolve, heart racing, breathing hard, she let out a "please," in a ragged whisper, and he knew that she meant _please stay, please forgive me, please love me_. But he couldn't stay. So he raced out of the bathroom, grabbed his duffle, and fled the house.


	4. Dealing with Betrayal

A/N: Happy Birthday to me! And it's my nine year anniversary on :) So to celebrate, here's an update.

Thanks to CrescentBlade, Devilsblackangel, and SuperTifa for their kind comments. I promise I won't moan about reviews anymore!

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**Chapter 4: Dealing with Betrayal**

Vincent didn't remember exactly what happened to him after he left Tifa on the bathroom floor. He only remembered climbing on his gold chocobo and riding into the rising sun with no destination in mind. He rode until the sun set, and the chocobo could go no further. Then he stopped and huddled into his mount's warm feathers, hoping that in sleep he would be able to keep his dark despair at bay. Sleep instead brought nightmares. They were unfamiliar only in that he had not had them in years. As always there was the same feeling of being trapped, chained, and held down against his will, of screaming so loud he thought his head might explode from the pressure, but no one able to hear it, or willing to answer. And there was also the familiar, though long-dormant, feeling of rejection and complete and utter failure.

He woke up disoriented. The ground was cold at his back and he was covered in blood. Quickly healing scabs revealed that he'd been clawed, perhaps by an animal. But even those wounds could not account for all the blood that covered his body. Sitting up slowly and looking around, he discovered that he was in the flat plains of the Nibel area. To the south he could see the ocean, and to the north he saw the dark ominous mountains of his nightmares. Then a few paces behind him he saw the carnage of what was left of his chocobo, and the unmistakable signs of its killer. _Chaos…Oh, gods, oh, Odin, what have I done?_

It had been years since his last transformation. The final battle with Sephiroth, in fact. In that time he had realized that the monsters within him that he had loathed so much were actually a protective mechanism. They only came out in times of great danger…or emotional distress, and only if he let them. There had been many battles when he felt that he had come to the limit of his tolerance, but he did not let his terrifying alter egos run loose. And even though he wanted to deny it, there was a part of himself that consciously wanted to let them out to roam free. The same part of him that had been able to turn a blind eye to all the atrocities he had witnessed as a Turk. And now he had let Chaos reign free again. Because he did not want to deal with the pain in his heart. The blanks in his memory could be as much of a blessing as they were a curse.

But at the same time he felt guilty for his cowardice. He never should have let it happen, and now Ororo was dead. And it frightened him. Never had Chaos attacked anything but mutated wildlife or enemies. Had he been so distraught that he couldn't control the monster within him anymore? And apparently he had been out of it for quite a while in order for him to have come so far. To the Nibel Mountains. It was in these mountains that his nightmare had begun. In the distance he could see lights from the tiny village shining against the dark canvas of the night and the ominous land giants behind it. Should he go back? But before he did, he should dispose of the body of his traveling companion.

Not having a shovel in which to dig with, he pulled out the fully equipped Death Penalty and used his Earth materia to create a small crack in the soil that he could widen with his hands, and then he gathered the somewhat scattered remains and placed them in the hole in the ground, covering them with dirt. As he was doing this he noticed that the flat plains were eerily quiet. He could remember a time when he had not been able to go more than a couple of hours without being attacked by some sort of monster. They had usually been easy to dispatch and nothing more than a nuisance, but they had also quenched his thirst for blood. In the Midgar area of the Eastern Continent there had been a decline in the number of monsters in part because mako was no longer used as a source of power, and because he and some others had made a sport of hunting them and eliminating the threat they posed to society. Perhaps the same thing had happened in this area. He wondered if the lack of wildlife had anything to do with why Chaos had attacked Ororo. It still unsettled him, though, to think that he had been so hungry that he had not been able to restrain himself. Had all those years he'd repressed the demon within behaved like a pressure gauge just waiting to explode? He had no easy answers.

When his task was done, he bathed in the flowing stream of the wild meadow, washing away the dirt and grime of his journey and the blood of his guilt. But no matter what, he didn't feel clean, and he despaired that he ever would. At one time he had dared to hope. When Tifa would look at him with ruby eyes filled with love, or smile at him with her joy, he could pretend for a few moments that he was a whole man, and not a walking corpse. He had been a fool to believe otherwise.

Suddenly, he was struck with the futility of his existence. Why was he still here when he was just a monster? Why had he ever believed that he could have love, that he could possibly even deserve it? It was no wonder that Tifa had betrayed him. He could never be the man that she truly loved, and he could never give her the child that she dearly wanted. But he still loved her, and that made him an even bigger fool. What kind of man wasted his life longing for a woman he could never possess? And what kind of fool would fall for such a woman not once, but twice? He deserved death. In that moment he longed for it like a thirsty man in the desert.

He reached down to lift up the pants leg of his trousers, revealing the pistol he had strapped to his calf. The Quicksilver had long been his companion, and he felt an affinity to it. It would only be fitting. He knew that if he were to open the clip he would find the weapon fully loaded. He was ready.

So he undid the safety and stuck the barrel in his mouth. He could taste the metal and feel the cold press against his teeth. All he need do is pull the trigger and say goodbye to the world in an explosive kiss of death. There was no reason to continue his lowly existence. Tifa was lost to him, and he was lost to the ravages of his mind.

So he pulled the trigger, but at the last possible millisecond he flinched, and with inhumanly fast reflexes, he managed to turn the gun, sending the bullet through his jaw and not his brain.

He lost consciousness for he didn't know how long, but when he woke up he felt as if his whole face was on fire and there was a stab of pain in his jaw with every throb of his heart. He gingerly lifted a hand to his left cheek, unsure of what he would find. But his hand encountered slick flesh; his face was still there. And he was still alive.

He felt incredibly weak, but he was curious about what he must look like, so he dragged himself a couple of feet to the stream where he had washed his bloody hands earlier and peered down at the water that mirrored his reflection back at him. Amazingly, there was no hole in his face, but the shiny pink flesh of a freshly healing wound. It was a jagged mess; he could see the tracks on his skin where the bullet had gone through and the flesh had knitted back together, but he suspected that in a matter of days, perhaps even hours, his face would be back to normal, leaving not even a scar.

How could he have forgotten? He knew that he had uncanny healing abilities. He'd been shot, set fire to, poisoned, and slashed by any number of monstrous creatures in his battles, but he'd hardly ever needed a cure spell or potion. He'd never purposefully tried to take his own life, though. And his injuries, although sometimes serious, had never been life-threatening. Everything that had happened to him had happened to the other members of the party, and they'd survived, even without his miraculous healing abilities. Was it possible? Could he even be killed?

He'd pondered the idea before. When he'd been placed in the coffin, he hadn't believed that he deserved the surcease of pain granted in death. He had too much to atone for. And there was something about the unknowable endlessness of death that he feared. Coward that he was, he was afraid of what might be there to greet him on the other side even more than the pain he knew of his immortal existence. No doubt an eternity in the fiery pits of hell and torment awaited him, although it couldn't be all that different from what he experienced now. Yet something kept him tethered to this world. At first it was his longing for Lucrecia, and the chance to atone for his sins, and then it was Tifa and her love. Now there was nothing.

If he really wanted to end his life, then there was only one place where he could go to find answers. Perhaps it was Providence that had led him to this area, or maybe deep down he had always known that he needed to go there. And then suddenly he realized that Chaos had brought him back to the beginning for a reason. Something in the old mansion was summoning him. And he knew he had to find out what it was if he was going to get any peace of mind.

* * *

Even though there were people living in Nibelheim, it still felt like a ghost town. It wasn't supposed to be there, and yet there it was, filled with people that weren't supposed to be there either. The townspeople no longer pretended that Sephiroth hadn't destroyed it, though. After the Shinra Electric Company had been destroyed and it was no longer able to put the villagers on its payroll for their silence, no one felt the need to keep up the pretense. But no one liked to talk about the original Nibelheim either.

As Vincent walked past the gates, he tried not to think about the trysts underneath the old well in the center of town, or the decades-old heartbreak he felt when his proposal had been turned down. And he definitely did not want to think about the house that a young girl had grown up in, had practiced the piano in, and had trained in to become one of the best martial artists in the world, all while he had slept. But as he made his way through the sleepy town, and towards his destination, the memories and thoughts came unbidden. There was no denying them. And when he finally stepped into the dilapidated old mansion, feelings of dread, disgust, and loathing filled him. It was in this place that he had lost his humanity to a mad scientist and the woman who loved him.

The moldy air seemed to suffocate him, and his skin crawled with the dust and dirt, and evil that just seemed to exude from everything in his sight. But he braved on. He went directly to the basement. He passed the room that held his coffin without a single glance and entered the laboratory. He wasn't sure what he was expecting, but it wasn't the silence and darkness that greeted him, even though he should have expected it. It was sort of anticlimactic. Not knowing what else to do, he picked up a journal that was sitting on a table in front of him and began to read after his eyes had adjusted to the dimness. It told the story of two subjects who had been injected with Mako. One had been affected while the other had not. And then they had escaped. Intuitively guessing who the two subjects had been, he threw the notebook down. Then he went into the library and picked up another notebook. And then another. And then another. He spent hours in the library reading and discarding until he found what he'd instinctively been looking for. The notebook told the story of a gunshot victim—dead—but who had been brought back to life. It gave a detailed account of every gruesome experiment, and all the effects. It showed him at his weakest and most pathetic. He read it greedily, anxiously, incessantly, like it was a holy scripture that could provide him with a means of redemption.

Unfortunately the laboratory in the Shinra Mansion held no answers for him. He suspected that there was an escape from his tortured existence, but the scientific jargon meant nothing to Vincent despite his eidetic memory. If he were to piece together a solution to his problem, it would require him to become victim again to another madman's genius. And he didn't want to subject himself to any more experiments. His one attempt at suicide had been painful enough. And although he could stand the pain, had born even worse pain with each transformation that he'd made, could he do it again and again indefinitely in the hopes that one day, one bullet, or one stab wound, or one fall from a high mountaintop would be the final attempt, and he would at long last cease to exist? The gods' honest truth was that the same thing that tied everyone on the Planet to this life bound him as well. He wanted to live. He wanted to keep breathing; he wanted to wake up to the beauty of the dawning of a new day. He no longer lived for Lucrecia; he could live without Tifa, couldn't he? He would find some other reason to live, to fight. He always had, hadn't he?

When he finished reading the journal, Vincent knew that he could not trust that kind of information with anyone, lest the same atrocities might befall someone else. So he set the mansion on fire, igniting fear into the hearts of the Nibelheim residents. Even though none of them had been there before when the village had been ignited into flames by the crazed general, the sight of the old house on fire conjured up fatalistic visions of another Sephiroth and another world crisis. Immediately, though, firemen were there to douse out the fire, and the police came and arrested Vincent for arson. He spent two days in jail before he finally gave his court appointed attorney the name of someone to come bail him out.

Cid Highwind had immediately abandoned his wife and young child to come to his friend's aid.

"Sweet fucking Shiva!" he'd bellowed when he saw the disheveled state Vincent was in. "What the hell happened to you?!"

Vincent didn't say anything, but nonetheless followed him onto his new flagship, the _Sierra_, which he'd named for his wife and daughter. Cid knew that there would be no point in hounding him for answers, so he let him be…at least for a little while.

Vincent came to him that night as he was tossing back a beer in the galley.

"I burned down the Shinra mansion."

"I know that, dumbass! What I don't know is why you were in that ass-backwards hick town, rather than in Kalm with Tifa."

"I don't want to talk about it, Cid."

"Fuck that! If you didn't want to talk you wouldn't be here. Tifa must be worried sick about you. Why didn't you call her to bail out your vampy ass?"

"She didn't tell you? I suppose she would not…" He was silent for a few moments, deliberating what he should say. Then he decided simply to be forthright. "She's pregnant."

Cid's face immediately broke out into a wide grin. "You horny old bastard!" he exclaimed slapping him on the back good naturedly. "I knew you'd knock her up one of these days—"

"The child is not mine."

"You must be so pr—what the f—who's the son of a bitch?! I ought to go after him and wring his scrawny neck—"

"Don't Cid. It's for the best."

"That's a pile of shit if I ever heard it."

"I can't…I'm—" Vincent began, but cut off thinking of a different way to approach the subject. "You know about the kinds of experiments Hojo implemented on me, correct?"

Cid nodded. Once at the beginning of their journey, when they'd been forced to room together even though they were still basically strangers, Vincent had awakened Cid with his violent nightmare-induced thrashing. Cid had tried to wake him up, and had been rewarded with a metal claw choking his neck. When the nightmare had finally broken its hold on Vincent, and awareness returned to his blood red eyes, he'd apologized, but then the next time they'd managed to find an inn to stay in, he took the night watch while everyone else slept, and subsequently, they never shared a room again. Even though Vincent never went into detail about his ordeal, Cid knew that Vincent had been fucked up badly.

"Well, they've made me…sterile. And Tifa and I…we thought about adopting…but I know how much she wanted a child of her own…"

"Are you trying to say that Tifa was artificially inseminated?"

Vincent shook his head, his expression filled with anguish.

"Then who?"

"I wish I could say that it doesn't matter. She says that it was only once, and that it will never happen again. But I do not know if I can get past this."

"Shit…I don't know if I could either." Cid thought about his own wife and how much grief he'd given her, and still did despite himself, yet somehow she'd still stayed faithful. And at that moment he realized that he took that for granted.

"So would it be terribly inconvenient if I stay with you and Shera for a while…until I get things sorted out?"

"Of course, I don't mind…as long as you don't mind a screaming 18 month old. Madison-Sierra's kind of loud and stubborn like her dad…" He let the sentence hang for a few moments before he realized what he had said. "Oh, shit! I didn't mean it like that."

"Do not apologize, Cid" Vincent replied solemnly. "You have every right to be proud of your daughter."

Cid nodded slowly. "I'm just sorry…"

Vincent accepted his apology with a shrug.

Cid looked down at his beer and realized that he could use something harder. And looking at Vincent's dejected countenance, he thought he could use something else too. Getting up to reach into the cabinet, he pulled out two glasses and some whiskey. "I say this occasion calls for us to get shit-faced. Whaddya say?"

"You are aware that I do not get easily intoxicated."

"There's more where this came from," Cid replied pouring their drinks.

"Thank you," Vincent said picking up his glass.

"What shall we toast to?" Cid asked.

Vincent sighed. "To our wives."


	5. The Support of Friends

**Chapter 5: The Support of Friends**

Shera had been surprised when Cid had returned to their home with Vincent in tow, but had welcomed him with open arms nonetheless. He'd stiffened when she asked him how Tifa was doing, and when Cid answered for him, mumbling something about her being fine, she hadn't questioned either of them. She'd been bursting with curiosity, but decided not to press Vincent to explain anything to her, as she'd bug Cid about it later.

Later came after she'd pressed Vincent into service watching Madison-Sierra while she made dinner. She didn't know what was bothering him, but she hoped that playing with her daughter would comfort him a little. After dinner she settled him into a guest bedroom. She'd left fresh towels for him, and after making sure that she heard the shower running, she pounced on Cid who was at work in his study.

"Tell me the truth," she said. "What's wrong with Tifa?"

Cid went for his pocket absently as if to pull out a cigarette, but it was empty because he'd quit after Shera told him she was pregnant. Sighing in frustration, he eyed his wife warily.

"You have to promise not to say anything. Not because you're not supposed to know or nothing, but I just don't want you to upset Vincent. He came here 'cause he needs time to think."

Shera frowned in concern. "What on earth happened?"

"Tifa cheated on Vincent."

"I don't believe it!" she exclaimed in disbelief.

"It gets worse. Now she's pregnant with another man's baby."

"How could she _do_ such a thing?"

"I don't know. It doesn't sound like Tifa at all."

"Vincent must be heartbroken."

Cid nodded. "You saw the way he looked. Like he'd been run over by a fucking train."

"I'm going to go check on him." Shera made move to leave the room, but Cid hopped out of his chair and rushed around the desk to stop her.

"Shera, he's in the shower!" he exclaimed, grabbing her shoulders. "You're going to smother him, which is exactly the reason I didn't want to tell you at first."

"I can't help it. He's my friend."

"I know. I want to help him, too. But I don't know what to do."

Shera nodded in acquiescence and wrapped her arms around Cid's waist, leaning in so that she could rest her head on his chest. Cid settled his arms more comfortably around her neck so that they were hugging. "I suppose all we can do is give him a place to stay," she said finally. "And time. And our support."

"That's all we can do, unfortunately."

They both remained silent for a long time after that, troubled over the plight of their friend. Neither liked the feeling of helplessness that his situation evoked, but they were both well aware that there would be no easy solutions.

* * *

Yuffie rapped on the door to Vincent and Tifa's house for several minutes without getting a response. Although responsibility as Lady of the Pagoda kept Yuffie busy most of the time in Wutai, she regularly liked to visit her friends in Kalm. Surprised by the seeming absence, since she had called yesterday to remind Tifa of her long ago planned visit, she looked underneath the flowerpot on the side of the house and pulled out the spare key. Opening the door she called out to Tifa as she walked inside. She couldn't tell if anyone was there or not, so she decided to do a quick tour of the house to make sure. She started with the kitchen and saw that there were dishes in the sink, and deduced that someone must have been there recently since both Tifa and Vincent were rather fastidious about not leaving the house unclean. She then went into the master bedroom and saw that the bed was unmade and rumpled. There definitely had to be someone there. Neither Tifa nor Vincent would ever leave without making up the bed. She noticed a strip of light coming from underneath the bathroom door, so she went up to it and knocked. "Tifa, are you there?"

There was a groan in response and then the unmistakable sounds of someone vomiting.

"Sweet Shiva! Are you all right?" Yuffie exclaimed as she opened the door and found her friend huddled over the toilet bowl. She immediately knelt down next to her and pulled her hair back from her face as she continued to retch. When she was finished, Yuffie grabbed a washcloth, wet it with cool water and pressed it to the clammy skin of Tifa's forehead. They sat together with Tifa's head leaning on Yuffie's shoulder for a few minutes until Tifa began to feel better.

"Do you have the flu or something?"

"'Or something'…you could say," Tifa replied, slowly standing up and walking towards the sink where she rinsed out her mouth and brushed her teeth. When she finished, she turned to Yuffie. "Thanks for taking care of me. I didn't hear you come in."

"I used the spare key."

"Oh? I'd forgotten there was one," Tifa replied absently. "I'm glad you remembered…"

Tifa slowly walked out of the bedroom and lowered herself onto the bed. She sat with her knees pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapped around them, as if to conserve warmth. Yuffie followed her, alarmed by her tired pace and the sick pallor of her skin.

"So are you going to tell me why you were throwing up?" she asked.

"Yes," Tifa responded looking up at Yuffie who was hovering over her next to the bed. "I'm going to have a baby."

"Oh, my goodness! That's fantastic news!" Yuffie immediately leaned down to hug her friend. "I know how much you've wanted a baby. Both you and Vincent."

When she pulled away, she noticed that Tifa didn't seem too excited about it. Tears were streaming down her face and she didn't look Yuffie in the eyes.

"What's wrong? Is there something wrong with the baby?"

"The baby's…fine," she choked out through her tears. "It's Vincent."

"Where is he? He should be here to take care of you." Yuffie sat down beside Tifa and began to rub her back consolingly.

"I…I've done something terrible."

"Tifa, what are you talking about?"

"The baby…it's not Vincent's. It's Cloud's." The last part was let out in a low keening wail.

"What?!" Yuffie pulled away from Tifa to stare at her incredulously.

"I cheated on Vincent with Cloud," she whimpered.

Yuffie abruptly stood up. "Tifa! I can't believe you! How could you do this to Vincent?!" She shook her head angrily. "You—who's never done a selfish thing in your entire life. You went and broke Vincent's heart, and with that spikey-haired ass who left you out in the cold no less! Oh, Odin, I could wring your cheating neck at this moment!"

"What?" Tifa squeaked in surprise, not really expecting this level of anger from Yuffie. Although she had never really lost her youthful spunkiness, years bearing the heavy responsibilities of being a leader of Wutai had given her a certain maturity and she had learned to control her emotional outbursts. But at this moment Yuffie was incensed, and understandably so.

"Don't 'what' me!" Yuffie exploded as she began to pace. "You were supposed to be the faithful one! I'm the one who was supposed break a few hearts, and be irresponsible enough to get pregnant, and not know who the father was—at least that's what Godo's been predicting my whole life on account of my 'wildness.' And you _knew_ I liked Vincent. But you were the one he loved because of your long flowing dark hair that reminded him of Lucrecia or something, or maybe it was just because you have bigger boobs…I don't know, but I was SO jealous of you!"

She ranted, finally releasing years' worth of repressed resentment. "But I consoled myself because I thought you could make Vincent happy, and that's all I wanted for him. But nooooooo! You had to go and sleep with Cloud! You had to get knocked up by him! And my guess is Vincent's out there wandering the Planet depressed and moping…or gods forbid he went back to that god-awful coffin to sleep off another thirty years in order to get over your betrayal!"

Tifa was devastated by Yuffie's words. She knew she could say nothing that would excuse her behavior, and yet she wanted nothing more than for her friend not to be mad at her and forgive her. If Yuffie could be so angry, then there was no hope that Vincent would ever forgive her either. But she had to try.

"I'm sorry, Yuffie," she cried. "There's no excuse for what I did, but I never meant to hurt him, or you. You're my best friend. You have to believe me."

Yuffie stopped her pacing and turned to look at Tifa. She looked completely despondent. She was still crying and her eyes were puffy and red. On the big empty bed she looked like a small child. Yuffie didn't have the heart to hold onto her anger. It seemed that after expelling her initial fury, Yuffie could no longer feel so self-righteous. She sighed. "I'm not the one you need forgiveness from. I guess I'm just surprised. After what Cloud put you through, I didn't think you'd ever be able to see him again without taking one of Vincent's guns and shooting him with it."

Tifa looked away guiltily. "I guess I wasn't as over him as I thought I was. Oh, I was angry. And I let him know with a fist to his jaw. And a knee to his groin…which he dodged—"

"Obviously."

"Yes, I suppose that's true enough." She chuckled humorlessly. "But after I'd finished yelling at him, he was there telling me all the things that I'd waited so long to hear. That he loved me, and that he was sorry that he hurt me. That after all his searching he'd finally come to realize that I was the only thing he wanted. And I felt vindicated. So I thought there was no point in hating him anymore. I was happy with Vincent and he had nothing. Just a memory of a girl with brown hair and huge green eyes. And I felt sorry for him. And for myself, too, for wasting so much time. And when he kissed me…it didn't hurt anymore. So I thought I could give him one last goodbye…It was over quickly. And I told him that I never wanted to see him again. And I never have."

"Were you thinking about Vincent at all? And how devastated he'd be if he found out?"

"I only thought that he should never find out. When Cloud called me and asked me to meet him, I could have told him no. I could have told Vincent about it. But I didn't think anything would happen, and I knew that Vincent wouldn't like it if I went to see Cloud. He wouldn't have said anything, but it would have brought up all his old insecurities. So when I agreed to meet Cloud I decided not to tell Vincent. It was so incredibly selfish of me."

"The fates have a way of bringing the truth to light no matter how much we try to hide things."

"Very true."

"So are you going to tell Cloud that you're pregnant?"

"I have no idea where he is. And I think even if I did know…I wouldn't tell him. He has so much on his mind. I don't think he's ready to be a father…if ever."

"But how can you know, if you never give him a chance to be a father?"

"I just do. He doesn't love me, and I don't love him either. Not anymore."

Yuffie thought there was more to it than Tifa was willing to admit, perhaps it hadn't even occurred to her why she would want to keep her baby's paternity secret from Cloud, but Yuffie decided that whatever Tifa's reasons were, it ultimately wasn't her decision.

"Well," said Yuffie, finally sitting down again on the bed beside Tifa, "It appears that you're determined that your child should be fatherless…if Vincent doesn't forgive you. I don't suppose it should be aunt-less as well." She wrapped a thin arm around Tifa. "You're my best friend, and I may not like what you've done, but it's not my place to judge."

Relieved, Tifa squeezed her in return. "Thank you, Yuffie."

Yuffie wiped away tears from Tifa's face. "Now let's get you some food. You look skinnier than I am and you're eating for two. I know a few things you can try that might settle your stomach. I should know," she added with a wink.

Tifa smiled wanly. "All right."

* * *

Dear CrescentBlade: I would have PMed you, but I couldn't find a profile, so I'll just leave a note here. Thanks for the concrit. I've already corrected my typo in Chapter 3. And I've reviewed my long paragraphs, but I think I'll just keep them. It wasn't exactly intentional, but I do think the longer paragraphs, sentences, and even fragments, reflect the emotions I was trying to convey better than if they were shorter and less connected. I can't exactly explain why, but that's just my gut feeling. But you did make me go back and rethink what I had done and why I had done it, and I really appreciate that.

Thanks also to SuperTifa and Devilsblackangel for the reviews and birthday wishes! And special thanks to Varna for PMing me, since she had already left a review and couldn't leave another one ;) And thanks to those of you reading my story, even if you aren't leaving a review; you might not be my reason for writing, but you are definitely my reason for posting.


	6. The Nightmare's Beginning

**Chapter 6: The Nightmare's Beginning**

Night after night voices haunted him.

The nightmares had returned. Perhaps they had never gone away, and he'd only repressed them temporarily.

His mother would whisper forlornly that he had been such a good boy. So well-mannered. So even-tempered. So affectionate. She was so disappointed…

The voice of his father would reprimand him severely for daydreaming, for falling asleep in class because he'd stayed up all night looking at the stars, for reading instead of practicing on his chocobo. He was disappointed that his son was nothing like him…little did he know that he could be a brute if he needed to be…

His first victim would accuse him of becoming the cold-blooded killer he'd tried to deny that he was becoming. His voice would merge with all the others he'd murdered. The men, women, and monsters. He did it because he was good. His superiors told him that he was a natural. He hated to admit how easy it was to take a life. As a sniper he didn't even have to be close. He could hide behind a wall. He didn't have to look his victim in the eye. He could hide what a coward he was…

Lucrecia's face would swim before him and beg him not to make her go back to her husband. But she had made her choice. He had a fearsome vision of himself stabbing her in the heart with the masamune blade…only her hair wasn't auburn, but dark chocolate. And her eyes weren't emerald green, but startlingly crimson. Sometimes he shot her. Sometimes he would wrap his bare hands around her delicate throat and squeeze the life out of her. He refused to give her another chance to break his heart. But he'd been a fool. A fool to think that a man as crazed as Hojo would not be upset that his wife had been unfaithful. A fool to think that he would easily accept her back. A fool to think that every day that she was with him, he didn't punish her for her infidelity. That he wasn't a cruel and vindictive bastard…

Sephiroth, the mighty general, would transform into a little boy with his mother's eyes and his father's dark locks, and question why he had abandoned his son, and then why he had helped destroy him. He didn't know whether it was true or not. Hojo told him it wasn't, but he could never be certain. The possibility remained in his mind. There would never be any way to find out for sure. And he wondered whether he should have tried more to help him, even if he wasn't his son, simply because he was Lucrecia's…

The demons inside him would scream the loudest of all. _You'll never get rid of me…no matter how hard you try…_

_One of these days, I'm going to kill the ones you love…and you can't stop me…_

_Do you know the real reason we exist, Vincent? We're not just part of Hojo's experiment. We're a part of you… _

His guilt, his fear, his worry converged in his mind, overwhelming him. He would break out into a sweat and pant as if his mental battle had physically manifested itself. He would toss and turn, and thrash. When Tifa had been beside him some part of his brain would grab control and stop himself. But she was no longer there.

Eventually he would wake up disoriented and exhausted. He would stare at the strange ceiling of his room in Cid's house, and then reach for the bottle of whatever he'd managed to find, and drink quickly until he passed out again. Sometimes the nightmares would return, but sometimes they'd leave him alone for a few quiet hours.

* * *

He wasn't sure what he was doing there, but his chosen poison was whiskey and he might as well go to a bar to get it. It had nothing to do with the leggy blonde who served him drinks. She had nothing in common with Tifa other than her chosen profession and that suited him just fine. He needed no other reminders of her than the ones that stayed in his head, refusing to let go. Memories of her hot kisses on his skin, the gentle mewing sounds she made when he touched the deepest part of her, and the way her irises dilated to black pools when she came, those memories of her were beginning to drive him mad because even as he remembered her, he couldn't help but imagine her with _him._ He needed a drink. He needed to flee to the nothingness of oblivion, which even drink might not even grant him…but he could try.

The barmaid smiled as she served his drink and didn't shy away when he stared at her with what must have been hunger in his eyes. When he'd gone through about a dozen drinks and continued to ask for more, she didn't try to cut him off, but coyly asked him if he'd be able to pay for them all. When he'd nodded in assent her eyes had lit up like she'd hit the jackpot.

She let him stay even as she began to close up the shop. He was the only patron left and he was still nursing a drink, and she seemed to want the company. She told him about herself, not too subtly dropping hints about where she lived and the kind of men she liked. She didn't even seem to mind that he didn't say anything. When she was done mopping the floors she approached him cautiously. He didn't move when she stood in front of him, invading his personal space. She smelled like sweat and turpentine, with an underlying scent of something sweet, perhaps from a perfume that had long since worn off.

He didn't move a muscle when she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. His mouth opened involuntarily. Taking that as all the encouragement she needed, she wrapped her arms around his neck, running her fingers through his hair and pressing her breasts firmly into his chest. When she darted her tongue into his slightly parted lips his mind went blank and he forgot about everything but the taste of her lips and the heat of her skin pressed against him. His hands went to her hips pulling her closer, and he deepened the kiss, giving into the mindless pleasure of physical release. But even as he did, thoughts of Tifa began to invade his mind. He imagined her moaning in Cloud's arms and it made him harder with anger. He thought about Cloud's tongue in her mouth, and Cloud's hands on her body, and as much as it drove him crazy it spurred on his lust as well. In his own infidelity he was re-enacting hers, and he felt ashamed even as he continued to indulge in that which was so prettily offered up to him.

Her hands went up to his cloak and began unbuckling the fasteners. When the cloak had been disposed of, she went at the buttons of his shirt, giggling when she managed to carelessly rip one off. Vincent squeezed her bottom, and then a hand snuck underneath her skirt, slowly lifting it up as his hand searched for her panties. But it was only Tifa's cries of pleasure he heard when his hand found its target and began to roughly pull them down. And it was only Tifa's lips that he felt pressed against the skin of his collarbone. So it was no surprise when it was Tifa's name that came pouring out of his mouth while searching hands delicately cupped Vincent through his trousers.

The barmaid froze in his arms and and Vincent's eyes shot open as the foggy lust-filled haze abruptly left him and he realized what he had done. "I'm sorry," he quickly apologized. But the moment was over. He withdrew his hand from underneath her skirt, and then began to re-button his shirt.

The barmaid shook her head sulkily and walked away. Vincent grabbed his cloak from the ground where she had discarded it. She was already at the door holding it open for him.

Vincent was halfway through the door, when she sighed and said, "You should just go back to your wife."

Vincent was surprised at her observation. "What if I told you she was pregnant with another man's baby?"

"It doesn't matter what she's done. You're still hung up on her. Just go back. You'll either work it out, or you won't. But at least you won't be wasting my time, or anyone else's."

"I'll think about," he shot behind him as he walked out the door.

"You do that." Then she shut the door behind him and locked it.

What in the world had he been thinking? He hadn't been thinking; that was apparent. He was filled with a deep sense of shame. He had never used a woman like that before; his sense of honor would never let him. But it had all gone out the window in his jealousy. He was jealous of Cloud. If he was honest, he had always been jealous that a man like him could inspire such devotion from a woman like Tifa. And now he was so jealous of their one act that had resulted in Tifa's pregnancy that he could hardly think straight. And even though his jealousy had given rise to his decision to go to the bar that night, he still felt guilty that he had dishonored their marriage vows. They were still married, weren't they?

It was obvious that he still loved that woman—damn her eyes—and yet he had himself tainted it. And what was more, he wasn't the one who'd had an affair and gotten pregnant. He wasn't the one who'd broken their trust…but yet, he still felt guilty. Guilty that in an act of desperation he had become as complicit as she had. Guilty because he knew the knowledge of such an indiscretion would hurt her, and yet the idea of having that kind of power over her, the power to hurt her, gave him comfort, even as it made him feel wretched.

So he vowed to keep it secret, and never to do it again. There were other ways that he could find escape.

* * *

Cid was surprised when he stepped around the corner of the local drug store and saw Vincent lighting up a cigarette. He was several feet away and already he could taste the tar and nicotine in his mouth. He felt the familiar craving that he'd been battling against for nearly three years. Immediately his anger flared up because after all that time the pull was just as powerful.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he demanded, marching up to him and pulling the cigarette from his mouth. He threw it to the ground and stomped on it defiantly.

"I was about to have a smoke."

"No joke, smartass. Whythe hell would you want to do such a thing?"

But Cid already knew the answer to that. He had only to look at Vincent to know the kind of turmoil he was in, and that he was trying to distract himself any way he could. And Cid knew that the reason that he was so angry himself wasn't because of what Vincent was doing, but because there was nothing he could do to help. And he wanted a damn cigarette so bad he was tempted to pick up the one he'd ground beneath the heel of his boot and light it.

He watched enviously as Vincent opened his jacket pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and lit one up. Vincent took a long drag, and then began to cough.

"What'd you do? Buy them today?"

Vincent shook his head, and then determinedly took another puff. "You know about my healing abilities, right?" Cid nodded. He remembered the first time he saw Vincent get injured. A pollensalta had glanced a blow to his leg deep enough to cut through the leather and through the muscle beneath. Cid had been about to cast a healing spell on him when he noticed that the gash had stopped bleeding and was beginning to close up. To say that he had regenerative capabilities was an understatement. The man was damn near invulnerable. "My body also resists poisons. When something toxic is introduced into my system, my body cleanses all the toxins out. It's the same way with alcohol or cigarettes. So essentially every time I smoke is like the first."

"Shit. No wonder you can drink me under the table without ever getting hung-over. Why do you even bother, Vincent? They're not going to help you."

"They won't kill me either," he replied with a wry smile.

"Maybe the cigs won't, but Shera will when she finds out what you've been doing. And then she'll kill _my_ ass for letting you."

"She doesn't have to know."

"She's got a nose like a fucking hound dog. She comes within a hundred feet of you, she'll know."

"All right," Vincent replied, flicking the cigarette carelessly to the ground. Cid's hand involuntarily reached out to catch it before it fell, but watched helplessly as it hit the ground and skittered into a muddy drain.

"That's better," Cid replied, satisfied. When Vincent said nothing, and only stood there looking as dejected as ever, Cid began to feel guilty. "Listen, I know I sound like a nag bitching at you the way I am, but it's only because I'm worried about you. First the drinking, now this? You can't go on like this forever." Cid immediately regretted his poor choice of words, considering it was likely Vincent _could_ live forever. "Shit."

"I know what you meant…that you're only trying to help…"

They drifted off into an uncomfortable silence, until Cid broke it. "When was the last time you spoke to her?"

"When I confronted her about her pregnancy."

"Then you probably just need closure…either way. You know, just talking with her doesn't mean you have to forgive her?"

"I know."

"Maybe you should just call her and cuss her out. If it will make you feel better."

"You _would_ make a suggestion like that." Vincent laughed. It was a low humorless sound. Then, "Did it help?"

"What?" Cid asked confused.

"Is that why you punished Shera?"

"Well, that's kind of different." Cid thought about it for a moment. "But I guess you're right in a way. After the failed rocket launch I felt that I had the right to be angry, and Shera felt guilty enough about it to let me get away with it. But I broke her heart so many times. You don't want to do that to Tifa, I don't think."

Vincent had already come to a similar conclusion. "You know, I've dialed her phone number about a hundred times a day. I'll dial all of the digits except the last one, and then I'll hang up. I know she's waiting for me, and she'll wait as long she has to, but I know that if I forgive her, there will be no turning back. I'll be committed to her…and her baby…and I don't know how I can do that when all I can think about is how she betrayed me and how damn angry I am. And as much as I love her, it would be unfair of me to take her back if I can't get past it because I'd only end up punishing her, and myself…and the child."

Both he and Tifa had already been hurt enough in their lives. The last thing he wanted to do was add to that.

* * *

Cid knew that he reeked. He tried to sneak into the laundry room through the back door and throw his clothes into the washing machine before Shera could catch a whiff of him, but as soon as he stepped into the house he knew that he was in deep shit.

"Do NOT tell me you were smoking again!" Shera stood in the doorway of their bedroom, which was several feet away.

"What the hell kind of woman are you? I _just _got in," Cid mumbled.

"You stink!" she exclaimed, coming up to point a sharp finger into his chest. "You promised you wouldn't smoke anymore! How could you do this?"

"It wasn't me!"

"Oh, that's a likely story. You come home smelling like an ashtray and I'm supposed to believe you weren't smoking?"

"Yes!"

"Well, if it wasn't you, then who was it?"

"Vincent."

"Vincent?" she asked incredulously. "He doesn't smoke."

"He does now."

"Since when?"

"Today."

"But why?" Cid simply stared at her. "That stupid bitch!" Cid was startled by her vehement anger. Shera only cursed when she was very angry, and after putting up with him for so long, it took a _lot _to make her angry. "First the _whore_ drives him out of his own home by sleeping around on him, then she has him drinking booze to try to get over her sorry ass, and now she has him defiling his lungs with those disgusting cigarettes?! If I ever get my hands on her—"

"That's _enough!_" Vincent's voice interrupted. Shera swiftly turned around to see that Vincent had come in through the front door. She almost wished she hadn't looked. His eyes were glaring daggers at her.

"Vincent!" she exclaimed in surprise.

"I know that Tifa has made mistakes," he started, his voice shaking with barely contained anger. Cid took a protective step closer to Shera, not liking the look in Vincent's eyes. Vincent took note and closed his eyes in attempt to calm himself. When he opened them he had on a more controlled mask. "Every time I think about what she did," he continued softly, "it feels like someone has ripped out my guts with a rusty meat hook. But I don't ever want to hear you talk about her that way again. I'm actually surprised at you. I would think you would know better than anyone that someone's actions don't necessarily make them a bad person." Vincent looked pointedly at Cid, who had relaxed since Vincent seemed calmer.

Shera looked thoroughly contrite. "You're right, Vincent. I'm sorry," she began sincerely. "But I will not sit by and watch you destroy yourself! I've stood by for too long as you've drunk yourself into oblivion, which I know is hard for you to do. Then today Cid tells me you've taken up smoking. What's next? Are you going to start injecting yourself with mako?"

Vincent didn't respond, but looked guiltily at the floor. It gave Shera the perfect opportunity to pounce. "You can't keep doing this to yourself. I won't allow it. So if you're going to continue to stay here then there are going to be a few rules. No more drinking, and no more smoking!"

"You're right," Vincent agreed easily. "Maybe I should move out."

"Shera! Now look what you've done!" Cid jumped in accusatorily.

"No," Vincent interrupted before Cid or Shera could say more. "I can see that I've caused some problems between the two of you, which is the last thing I wanted to do, so I'll be out of here as soon as I pack my bag."

"I won't allow it!" Cid exclaimed. "You're going to stay your ass here even if I have to sit on you!" Vincent was taken aback by his insistence. "But I agree with Shera. No more drinking or smoking."

Vincent sighed. "You're really not going to let me leave?"

Both Cid and Shera shook their heads.

"All right. I'll stay. And I agree to your rules."

Shera flew into his arms to hug him tightly. "I know this is hard for you, Vincent. But I couldn't bear it if you were out there on your own trying to deal with this. Thanks for staying."

"It's not like you gave me much of a choice," he replied wryly. Shera laughed.

When they'd finally let him return to his room, as if they were afraid to let him out of their sight, Vincent laid on the bed and began to wonder whether staying was really a good idea. Shera's good-natured coddling had begun to get to him. He knew that both she and Cid were only worried about him, but he didn't like feeling pitied. And despite their insistence that he stay, he knew that he could not stay there forever. So he decided that it was past time for him to leave. He had to get on with his life…He had to figure out how to go on without Tifa even though the thought of that made him feel terribly empty. But he'd gotten over Lucrecia. He could get over Tifa, couldn't he?

He looked down at the gold band on his left ring finger. Even after all this time, he still hadn't been able to take it off. There was still a part of him that wanted to hold on to the belief that this all was just a vivid nightmare, and when he woke up he would be in Tifa's arms, and he could let the dream settle into the dusty cobwebs of his mind. But it was time to move on, wasn't it? Hadn't he once told Tifa that an overpowering love could consume one, just as easily as despair? Perhaps it was time for him to take his own advice.

Releasing a breath he hadn't even realized he'd been holding, he took off the ring and promptly put it in his front shirt pocket. He tried not to think about how it was still close to his heart, and why he didn't have it in him to throw it away just yet. But he felt a bit firmer in his resolve that he was doing the right thing. His marriage was over, and nothing that happened would change that…right?


	7. The Catalyst

**Chapter 7: The Catalyst**

**_Three months later…_**

Cid knew that if he didn't do something, Vincent would wait the rest of his life, which would be a very long time, an eternity in fact, before he acted on what his heart felt. And he knew, too, that Tifa because of her guilt would never pursue Vincent, feeling that it was no more than what she deserved. So he decided that he would go talk to Tifa himself, on Vincent's behalf. He thought perhaps that he should have asked Shera to do it, since she was a woman, and was generally more diplomatic when it came to these matters, but in this case she was firmly on Vincent's side. Cid himself had given Tifa the benefit of the doubt, but he thought he owed it to Vincent to make sure that he was right about her. And he wanted answers.

It took Cid half a day to travel from Rocket Town to Kalm on the Sierra. When he got there he went straight to Tifa's house without bothering to check into the local inn. He was on a mission and there was no point in delay.

Tifa was clearly surprised when she opened the door and saw him standing there. "Cid, what are you doing here?"

Cid, too, was surprised, but mostly at her altered appearance. It had been a long time since he'd seen her, and gone was her slim figure. She'd bloomed into her pregnancy, her stomach full and round, and her breasts tautly stretching the fabric of her shirt. "Wow, you've gotten big."

"You mean fat," Tifa responded with a hint of levity.

"You're pregnant."

"Really, Cid? I didn't realize it."

"What's with all the sarcasm?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just…" she let her sentence trail off into nothingness as she looked away deep in thought. For many long moments, they just stood there as Cid took her in. Despite her bulging stomach, she seemed thin, much too thin, and there were dark smudges underneath her eyes, as if she weren't getting enough sleep. And then she finally looked up at him, and his breath was taken away as he glimpsed the depth of pain shrouding her dark wine eyes. "I'm completely miserable," she finally let out.

"Tifa, you don't look well. Why don't you sit down?" Cid asked, immediately stepping into her home and closing the door behind him. He offered her his arm and led her to the sofa he knew was in the sitting room adjoining the hall. She took his arm numbly and followed him, sitting down as he gently prodded her into doing. "Should I get you some tea? That always helped when Shera felt nauseous."

"How did you know?"

"You look a little green around the gills. I should know. Shera would look this way when she was about to blow."

"But was she still getting sick at six months?"

"Is that how far along you are?" Again he was alarmed at how thin she was. "It was hell for a couple of months. She couldn't even get a whiff of chicken without spewing chunks, and lived on saltine crackers and peanut butter. But then the morning sickness went away. And then she started craving weird things like pickled cactuar with butterscotch ice cream. Grossed the hell out of me, but she seemed to like it."

"I feel like I've been pregnant forever."

"Shera said the same thing."

"How is she? And how is the baby?"

"They're both fine. Although Shera's a little mad at me because Madison-Sierra's picked up one of my favorite words."

"Oh, no, don't tell me you've already begun to teach her how to curse!"

"Well, I think she's trying to say 'ship,' but it doesn't always quite come out that way." Cid grinned.

Tifa laughed when she caught on to the other word the little girl might be pronouncing. "You're such a bad influence."

"I've been trying to cut back. If you'll notice, I've been here five minutes and haven't used the word 'fuck' yet…Oops!" They both laughed. "But obviously old habits are hard to break. Anyway, let me get you some tea. Still in the upper right cabinet in the kitchen?"

Tifa nodded. When he returned a little while later with a mug of tea for her, she'd finally built up enough confidence to ask the one thing she really wanted to know from the moment she'd realized that Cid was standing at her door. "Cid, how is Vincent?"

"You know that he had been living with us, right?" Tifa nodded her head. "Well, he moved out. He's still in Rocket Town, but he's got his own apartment. He's got a job too. At the weapon's shop."

"I'm glad he seems to be doing well."

"Don't let appearances fool you. He's miserable too."

"That's my fault," Tifa said as a tear fell down her cheek. "I hurt him in the worst way possible."

"Why?"

"I have absolutely no good reason. And if I could take it back then I would."

"Even if it meant you'd never have your own baby?"

Tifa seemed startled at the question and pressed her hand protectively to her stomach. "I didn't think about it that way."

"Well, I guess it doesn't matter," Cid replied, noticing her defensive posture.

"Do you think it matters to Vincent?"

Cid nodded reluctantly. "You're baby will be a visual reminder of how you screwed him over."

"Did Vincent tell you…who?"

"Yes." When Vincent had told him, Cid had wanted to hunt down and beat the spiky-haired ass into a bloody pulp. It didn't matter that once he had been their leader. The person that they'd all turned to for strength. Cid had lost all respect for him when he'd left Tifa in the dead of the night, like a coward, leaving Vincent to pick up the pieces of her shattered heart. He hadn't thought that any of the former team members had heard from Cloud in years. But apparently Tifa had, and in the most intimate of terms.

She must have seen something in his face because she began to cry in earnest then. "Oh, gods…he's never going to forgive me is he?"

"I guess you got the divorce papers?"

Tifa nodded and wiped away at a tear with her hand. "He actually called me and told me that since we'd already been separated for some months that he would appreciate it if I agreed to a divorce. I asked him, 'What if I refuse?" and he told me that I could do what I liked, I always did. I was devastated. Vincent has never been that cold to me before."

"Well, you did cheat on him," Cid chided gently.

"You don't think I know that?" Tifa cried out despondently.

"Of course you do," Cid said, finally giving in to his paternal instincts to pull her into his arms and hug her. She cried into his shirt, thoroughly soaking it, for a few minutes, until she calmed down some. She sniffed as she pulled away from him.

"What am I going to do, Cid?"

"If you love him, and I think you do, you'll do everything in your power to gain back his trust."

"But how can I do that when he wants to divorce me?"

"I guess you'll just have to change his mind."

"But how—"

"Dammit, girl! Why are you looking at me like I have all the answers?"

"Because you're his best friend! You're possibly the only person who knows what he's thinking right now."

"Well, if I were Vincent I'd be a little pissed at the person who cheated on me refusing to sign the divorce papers."

"So you think I should give him the divorce?"

"You can't ask me what you should do. The only person you should be talking about this with is Vincent."

"But he won't—"

"There you go with the 'buts' again."

Tifa winced as her baby pressed against her kidney. "I'm sorry, I'm just frustrated. And my back is killing me."

"Maybe you shouldn't stress over it and just concentrate on your baby." He noticed her rubbing a spot on her distended stomach. "Is the baby kicking?" She nodded. "May I?" he asked reaching out a hand, which she grabbed and brought to her belly. It felt like a fully inflated ball, hard and taught, and then he suddenly felt the tiny pressure of an elbow or a foot against his hand. He grinned at her, pleased that she had shared the experience with him. He pulled his hand away only with great reluctance.

Tifa smiled back hesitantly and tried to relax. Maybe things were better off the way they were. She'd cheated, and she was going to have another man's baby. The only fair thing would be to give Vincent what he wanted. She owed him so much, and it was the least she could do. But she never wanted to give him the impression that she didn't think he was worth fighting for. Sure, she'd screwed up, but if she could make it up to him, she would do anything it took.

"Ok, Cid. I've decided. I'll give him the divorce…but only if he agrees to talk with me. One last time. Do you think that's too demanding? I would go to him, but the doctor doesn't want me traveling too much." She didn't tell Cid that along with the nausea that wouldn't go away, she had been spotting occasionally so that her doctor had advised her to stay in bed as much as possible.

"I think he'll find it acceptable."

"I just hope I can convince him to give me some time to prove that we deserve another chance."

"I hope you can too."

* * *

After Cid returned home, he went to see Vincent and deliver Tifa's message. Vincent's apartment wasn't very far from the shop that he worked at, nor was it very far away from Cid and Shera's home. So he met Vincent, who was making his way home, on the street on his way there.

"Would you like to come inside?" Vincent offered politely.

"Yeah."

When they'd gotten settled, Cid immediately confessed about going to visit Tifa to see for himself if she was half as wretched as he was. She was thin, too thin, he'd said, despite her progressed pregnancy. Other than an almost imperceptible clenching of his jaw, Vincent showed no outward signs of being affected by Cid's words. Cid himself showed no outward signs of his own disappointment, and only continued by telling Vincent about Tifa's offer.

"I see," was Vincent's only response. Then he got up and walked out of the room.

He returned a few moments later. "If I go to see her, and hear her out, does she promise to give me the divorce if I still wish it?"

"Yes."

"All right, then. I'll do it."

"If you ask me, this is long past overdue."

"I wish to leave immediately."

"The sooner you get this over with, the better, I suppose?"

"That would be ideal."

"All right then. I'll have the _Sierra _ready in a few hours."

No more than two hours later, Cid had the _Sierra _off the ground and in the air with an estimated time of arrival in Kalm at about eight that evening. With the tailwind he expected it to be sooner.

Vincent was quiet and subdued. Cid played cards with Richter, his co-pilot, until he got a call over the radio. It was Shera. She'd just gotten a phone call from Yuffie who was trying to get in touch with Vincent. It was about Tifa. She had been admitted to the hospital where doctors wanted to do an emergency caesarian to take the baby and save her life. Tifa had refused, and they hoped they could get Vincent's consent, since he was her husband.

Cid immediately went to tell Vincent. He was reclining on the bed in one of the cabins reading a book. He immediately looked up when he heard Cid enter.

"Vincent, I have some bad news."

"What is it?" Vincent asked, with a concerned expression.

"It's…Tifa." Suddenly, Cid wasn't sure how to tell him what had happened.

Vincent's face automatically changed from an expression of mild concern to an unreadable mask.

Cid couldn't help but get a little angry at his reaction, or lack thereof. "She's in the hospital! I just got a message from Shera that Yuffie called to tell you that she's in danger of losing the baby, and she'll be lucky if that's _all_ that happens!"

Vincent immediately sat up, his still open book falling haphazardly to the floor. "How far away are we?"

"About two hours. But I'll try to make it sooner." Cid watched as a jumble of emotions flit across Vincent's face. Fear, worry, agitation, all were expressed on his haggard face. Finally as he seemed to bring his emotions under control, his expression returned to the passive unreadable mask he wore before. Cid began to realize that his outward serenity was only a defense mechanism to hide his true feelings.

Vincent broke Cid's thoughts when he said calmly, "You're a good man, Cid, and the best pilot I know. You have to get us there as soon as possible."

"Will do." With that, Cid left to man the helm, leaving Vincent to his troubled thoughts. He could only remember feeling as scared and sick as he did now once before in his life. It was when he had discovered Lucrecia collapsed and hemorrhaging in the middle of the floor at the Nibelheim Inn. For a long time he'd been convinced that she had died that day, and he had killed her for not getting there sooner. Now if Tifa died, it really would be his fault because he should have been there to protect her and take care of her. He didn't want to think about the possibility.


	8. The Promise

**Chapter 8: The Promise**

Vincent ran into the hospital. His only thought was that he had to get to Tifa before it was too late. He had to tell her…

In the maternity ward he was accosted by a nurse. "Are you Tifa Valentine's husband?" she asked when he told her his name.

"Yes, I am."

She told him to wait as she went to fetch the doctor. The nurse returned momentarily with a tall stern woman who introduced herself as Dr. Whitsun.

"Have you been apprised of the situation?" she asked.

"Yes."

"So then you know that Mrs. Valentine's refusal to let us do the Caesarian puts her life at risk. We need you to consent to the operation for her."

"Can I see her?' Vincent asked impatiently.

"Yes, but I'd like to inform you that it's urgent that we do this quickly."

"I understand."

Seeing that Vincent wasn't going to make a decision immediately, she had no choice but to show him to his wife's room.

When he walked into the room, Tifa was in the middle of a contraction. She held onto Yuffie's arm and had her eyes squeezed shut in pain. She was breathing heavily, and then she let out a loud groan as the pain built to a crescendo. As the pain ebbed, Yuffie rubbed her back comfortingly.

Yuffie was the first to notice that he was standing in the doorway. She gave him an unreadable look, then turned to Tifa who was still oblivious to his presence and told her that she was going to get her some more ice to chew, then got up and left the room.

Tifa slowly opened her eyes as she managed to relax a little and saw him watching her. "Vincent?"

"I came as soon as I could."

He was startled by her altered appearance. Even as the years had passed, she had always seemed young and beautiful. She was still beautiful, but she looked older, and weaker. And he began to wonder if her age had anything to do with the problems she currently faced.

"The doctors…they told you what they want to do?" she asked weakly. Vincent nodded. "You can't let them take my baby!" she said, more forcefully than he expected in her weakened state. But her voice was laced with panic that undoubtedly gave her strength.

Vincent felt his own panic rise. He had been trying to control it ever since Cid told him that Tifa was in trouble, but it suddenly broke through the dam he had built like an angry river oversaturated with rain. "Tifa, you're life is at risk!"

"I don't care!"

"If you let the doctors do the caesarian, you'll live. Do you want to die?"

"Not if my baby dies. This baby is the only thing I have left in this world worth living for."

Vincent was surprised by the despair he heard in her voice. Even when she had been at her worse, right after Cloud left her, she had had a stubborn will to live and survive—not just survive, but thrive. Cloud may have hurt her deeply, but she refused to let him break her. It was one of the things that he loved most about her. But now she seemed so broken. And he felt his own heart breaking a little bit more at the sight of her because he knew that he was partly to blame for her despondency.

Vincent reached out and drew a clammy hand into his own. "That isn't true, Tifa," he told her tenderly.

"What do you mean?" Tifa asked tearily.

"I mean that you have so much to live for. So much love to give. So many people would miss you…"

"Like who?" she asked hopefully.

"Like…Yuffie for one. She'd never forgive you for dying on her."

"Oh?" she asked, feeling disappointed. But she knew that it was beyond possible for him to ever feel the same way about her as he had before.

"She'd chase you to the grave with her Shuriken," he continued, "all the while yelling profanities in Wutaian."

Tifa couldn't help but giggle tiredly at that. Vincent always made her feel better. Some things never changed, she supposed.

Vincent was relieved to see her expression lighten. But was then suddenly reminded of how serious her condition was when another contraction seized her and she began to squeeze his hand. The other one had been only minutes earlier. Even he knew that it was much too early for her to have such strong contractions! She began breathing heavily and her face contorted into an expression of pain. Her fetal heart monitor began to beep incessantly and a nurse rushed in.

"The baby is going into distress, we need to act quickly!" She left the room and returned immediately with Dr. Whitsun.

"Mr. Valentine, it is really imperative that you make a decision now."

"Vincent!" Tifa panted. "You can't…let them…take…my baby…pleeeeeeeease!" The last word was let out in a keening wail that accentuated how much pain she was in.

"Are there no other options?" Vincent asked the doctor desperately.

"We've tried giving her a drug to make her contractions stop. I could up the dosage, but that is dangerous for both Tifa and the child. But if we can get them stopped then it will be better for the baby, of course, if we can keep her inside her mother for a little longer. But if we can't…"

"Then Tifa and the baby will die," Vincent finished. Dr. Whitsun nodded.

He turned to Tifa who was staring at him with panicked crimson eyes. Her contraction had receded, thankfully, rather quickly. "Tifa, I beg you. Don't do this. I know you want this baby, you've wanted it for a long time and I'm sorry I couldn't be the one to give it to you, but I can't let you die."

"Even now? After everything I put you through?"

"Even now." He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed them. "I tried to stop loving you," he confessed, "but I can't."

"Oh, Vincent!" she cried, pulling him down towards her and kissing him fiercely as if she was afraid he was just a ghost and would disappear as suddenly as he had appeared. He returned it eagerly, trying to forget how much he had missed her touch. She pulled away only to whisper how sorry she was over and over again.

"It's all right," he said, gently brushing sweat-soaked bangs out of her face with his hand.

She shook her head. "I know I don't deserve your forgiveness or your love. But I have to ask…please, if you still love me, let me do this," she begged him. Their eyes locked and in them they saw each other's fear, pain and the intense longing from the past few months of their separation reflected in each other's eyes. There was also hope. The hope that had been waning—Tifa's hope that Vincent would forgive her, and that her child would live, and Vincent's hope that he could return to their marriage and try to work out their problems—it had also returned full force. He leaned down and kissed her again, trying to impart some of his strength to her, and in turn take some of hers since he knew that they both had a long battle to fight still to gain back some of what they had lost. He also kissed her as if it might be their last, knowing that he could not deny her this chance, as he could never deny her anything her heart desired. Vincent came to his decision.

"All right," he said. "Just promise me something."

"Anything."

"Don't die on me."

As impossible a promise as it might turn out to be, she gave it whole-heartedly. "I won't." Vincent felt slightly less afraid at her words.

He turned to the doctor. "Give her the medicine."

"But Mr. Valentine—"

"I know what the risks are. So does she. Give her the medicine."

"I'll have you know that I strongly object." But the doctor pulled out a syringe anyway and began to administer it to Tifa. Then she left the room as if unwilling to see the results, which she felt would most likely be ill-fated.

Vincent stayed with her, and as another contraction mounted he climbed into the hospital bed to brace her with his strong arms and comfort her with his touch. When her contraction ended Tifa's heartbeat slowed, almost too slow, and her eyes closed as she seemed to relax. Vincent feared the doctor was right and that if she fell asleep she would never wake up.


	9. Reconciliation

**Chapter 9: Reconciliation**

When Vincent walked into her hospital room, Tifa was on her side facing a windowsill where a vase of wildflowers had been placed where they might get the most sunlight. She was so still that for a moment he feared that she was dead. As he took the seat next to her to sit down in, he had to remind himself that the danger had passed, and comfort himself with watching the steady rise and fall of her chest. Her face was illuminated by the sunlight as she slept, and his breath caught as he stared at the features so familiar to him.

After the medicine had been given to her all the muscles in her body went slack, and for a few desolate moments Vincent's stress-filled mind had imagined the worse. The doctors had given her what basically amounted to a muscle relaxant, which was the reason why they had been so reluctant to give it to her because it relaxed all of her muscles, including her heart. But they'd monitored her heartbeat and the baby's carefully and even though hers had slowed down some, it had remained steady. She slept peacefully now.

He hadn't wanted to leave her, but he felt that the others would want to know what was going on from him. Both Yuffie and Cid had been sitting anxiously in the waiting room. Cid had come to the hospital straightaway after he had secured the _Sierra _in a hangar at the airport. They had looked at him with nervous faces, and he managed to smile. "The contractions have stopped. Tifa and the baby are fine." Then he began to laugh with the absurdity of the situation. Usually proud fathers came to the waiting room to announce the birth of their children, not that the baby was still tucked away safely in the womb. And most fathers were actually the father; it wasn't some other man whom Vincent had once admired, but now hated with a passion, and yet still envied.

Yuffie and Cid had both looked at him worriedly. "Are you all right, Vincent?" Cid asked.

"I'm…I'm fine." Then he had laughed some more. It was his hardy full-bellied laugh that his friends had always thought he had employed at the oddest times. "I think…I'm just…relieved." Tears came to his eyes from laughing so hard.

"Maybe you should sit down," Yuffie suggested. "Or have some water?" she asked, lifting the pitcher of ice she had gone to get, which had begun to melt.

"No," said Cid. "I think we should just let him laugh it out."

Yuffie couldn't help but begin to laugh too, affected by her own relief and Vincent's unrestrained mirth. They laughed together as Cid watched them, his own grin of relief plastered on his face. Then suddenly he cursed. "Shit! I had better call Shera and let her know what's up. I'm sure she's worried out of her mind by now." He walked away to make the call.

This caused Vincent and Yuffie to laugh harder. "Shera's got him so whipped!" Yuffie exclaimed.

"I know!"

They laughed for a few minutes more until Vincent managed to get himself under control. Then Yuffie abruptly sobered up too.

In the ensuing silence Yuffie said, "I suppose I should call Barrett and Marlene. They were worried about her as well."

"Yes, I'm sure they'll want to know how she is doing."

"Can I tell you something first?"

"Of course. And I should be thanking you for your continued support of Tifa since I wasn't here," he said apologetically.

"Ohhhh, no!" Yuffie started angrily. "Don't you go blaming yourself for what happened to Tifa. You have very good reasons not to have anything to do with her ever again. But that is so like you! To take on the blame for other people's actions! It's so irritating! You did _nothing _to deserve being treated the way you were. Not by Lucrecia, not by Hojo, and certainly not by Tifa."

"It's complicated," he replied lamely.

"No. It's not! You're a good man, Vincent. You deserve so much better than what you've got. And it pisses me off when you just lay down in the dirt and take it."

Vincent looked at her with those penetrating crimson eyes of his, and Yuffie wondered if he could see into her soul. "What are you suggesting?" he asked her pointedly.

"I'm not suggesting anything!" she exclaimed, taken aback by his knowing expression.

"Then what did you want to tell me?"

Yuffie looked away. "Only that…I'm glad that Tifa's all right. I'm glad that you can forgive her because I know how heartbroken and guilty she felt—"

"What makes you think I've forgiven her?"

"Haven't you?" If was Yuffie's turn to look at him pointedly. "You're here. You could have stayed away. You could have told the doctors that you were about to divorce her and that it really wasn't your responsibility what happened to her or the baby. But you didn't. You came here and you claimed her and the baby as your own."

"I suppose you're right…when you put it like that."

"But I still think she doesn't deserve you. Not that I know who does, mind you." She smiled shyly. "I'm just…just glad that you're okay." Then suddenly she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly, but briefly, as if she were unwilling to hold on to him any longer.

"Thank you, Yuffie," Vincent replied, startled. "That means a lot."

Backing away from him, she said, "Now, I'm going to make those phone calls." With those words said she had left him in the waiting room, and he had returned to Tifa's room.

Vincent could tell immediately when Tifa began to wake up from the way her breathing changed. It went from deep even breaths to more controlled sighs. He waited for her to open her eyes.

"Hello, Tifa," he greeted her, helping her sit up in the hospital bed.

"Is the baby…?" She reached down to touch her still swollen stomach.

"The baby is fine."

"Thank the gods!" she cried out in relief. She reached for his right hand and brought it to her mouth to kiss it. "And thank you for not letting the doctors take my baby. I can't thank you enough. Even though you were afraid for me, you did what asked. Like you always do. I'm so sorry for what I put you through these last few hours. But I'm so grateful."

"You're welcome," he replied warmly. "I knew you would keep your promise." Tifa laughed somewhat warily, knowing it could not possibly be true, but wondering if it meant he trusted her again. "You seem to be doing well now," Vincent continued. "Dr. Whitsun told me she'd release you tomorrow with the restriction that you have complete bed rest for the remainder of your pregnancy."

"More like bed 'arrest.'" Tifa grinned. "But I don't mind. Not as long as my baby girl is growing inside me." She rubbed her belly lovingly. "Did you know she's a girl?"

Vincent nodded.

"Dr. Whitsun asked me if I wanted to be surprised, but I couldn't wait. I was dying with curiosity so I asked her to tell me. Now every time I go to the store and see something I think she might like, I have to buy it. I've got tons of these silly stuffed animals, and frilly little dresses. And I already started on the nursery. I was hoping that I would be able to finish before she was born…but I guess it can wait." She sighed.

"You know…" Vincent began hesitatingly, "I could help you with that if you would like me to. I could also move back in—to one of the guest bedrooms, of course—and help take care of you so that Yuffie doesn't have to."

Tifa nodded emphatically. "I would like that very much." Tears came to her eyes. "I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe that you're really here with me. I was so afraid that you'd never speak to me again, especially after I got those dreadful divorce papers! And I'm still a little afraid that I'll wake up and realize that this is just a dream."

"Why are you afraid?"

"Because I know I don't deserve you. But oh, Odin, I love you so much!" She tenderly pressed the hand that she was still holding to her chest.

"Have you ever thought that maybe I deserve you?"

"But you could have so much better—"

"I want you," he interrupted forcefully. "I want to be with you. I want to live with you. I want to take care of you."

"But Vincent," she pleaded, "I want to stop taking from you. You've given me so much, and I want to give you the same."

"Why not just accept that which is freely given?"

"Because it kills me the way that you get so much less than you give. It's been that way all your life, and I want to change that…it's only fair."

"You don't owe me anything, Tifa. Love isn't like that." He pulled his hand away from hers and rested it on his thigh.

"I know that. It's just…I've wanted this for you…and me…ever since before we were married. And I wasn't sure how it was possible, but now it's real, and I want this for you more than anything I've ever wanted..."

"What are you talking about?"

"I want you to be my baby's father. I want your name to go on her birth certificate. Then you will be her legal father. It won't be difficult. Since we're still married, you're the assumed father unless I say otherwise."

"What?" he asked nonplussed.

"That is…if you don't mind," she said nervously in reaction to his stunned look.

"What about Cloud?"

"He doesn't ever have to know. I've only told Yuffie and she's sworn to keep it a secret."

"I told Cid the truth. And I'm sure he's told Shera," Vincent pointed out.

"Oh," she said disappointedly.

"But I'm sure they would adhere to our wishes if we asked. It's not their secret to tell."

Tifa looked relieved. "So you see? Nobody else has to know. Everyone will believe that you're her real father."

Vincent stared at her for a few moments contemplating her offer. Tifa was worrying her wedding ring, a simple platinum band with their names and the date of their wedding inscribed on the inside. Even though Vincent had taken his off, he still kept it in one of the hidden pockets of his cloak which was resting on the back of the chair he was sitting in.

"I just want to know, is this offer really for me? Or is it for yourself? So that no one else knows what you did?"

"I…" That stopped her. She didn't know what to think. A part of her thought that it was really noble. But she began to see that she had had selfish motives in doing it, even if they were unconscious. Not only did she not want anyone else to know about her affair, but she didn't want any legal connections to Cloud either. "I never really thought of it that way, but of course you're right. I _am_ afraid that no one will be able to forgive me if they find out the truth, but you have to believe me, I meant it in the nicest possible way. It figures that I can't even do this one thing without selfish motivations. I'm so self—"

"It's all right, Tifa," Vincent assured her. "I don't mind. I would be honored to have my name on the birth certificate. I too would rather not have any reminders of your affair with Cloud."

"But you will." His statement reminded her of her greatest fear. "You'll have a living, breathing reminder when this baby is born. What if she looks like…him? Will you be able to love her and not resent her for my mistakes?"

"I… don't know," Vincent told her honestly. "But you know that I once thought that Sephiroth could have been my child?"

"Yes. You only found out the truth when Hojo declared it right before that last battle in Midgar."

"Even after I realized that he wasn't mine I still felt a connection to him. Maybe just because he was Lucrecia's son. I think I'd feel the same about your daughter. She's probably my only chance at fatherhood. And I could love her just because she's yours. You know how much I love you, right?"

Tifa nodded her head in relief. "It amazes me how much. You prove it to me over and over again. I'm ashamed for ever doubting your ability to love my—our daughter. She will be yours in every way that counts. And she's going to love you so much for how caring, and loving, and sensitive, and understanding you are. I can't wait for you to meet her." She began to weep in earnest from happiness, excitement, relief and all the hormones charging through her body.

"Have you thought of any names?" he asked, trying to distract her from crying.

"Yeah." She replied sheepishly. "One."

"What is it?"

"Valeria."

"Valeria?"

"It means 'strong.' And it starts with 'V' just like 'Vincent.' Valeria Valentine. I want everyone to know that you and she are alike. That she's yours."

"Valeria," he repeated. "Valeria Valentine. It's beautiful, as she will be no doubt."

Tifa sighed with relief. "I'm glad you like it."

As if in response to hearing her name, the baby kicked and Tifa grabbed Vincent's hand and pressed it against her stomach so he could feel it. He jumped when he felt the tiny foot press against his hand.

"That's her! She really moved," he gasped in surprise.

"That she did." Tifa smiled. Vincent smiled back, his eyes lit with a profound sense of joy, something he had not felt in many months. Vincent and Tifa still had a lot of issues to work on, but after so much pain, things were finally beginning to change for the better.


	10. Valeria

A/N: This is the halfway point and it was the original final chapter until I realized that I still had more story to tell. And there are only three more chapters until we get to brand spanking new material! This chapter has been edited to comply with ffnet's TOS. For the complete chapter please check out my profile at Archive of Our Own, which can be found on my ffnet profile page.

Devilsblackangel: Thanks for sticking with my story even though you don't like the direction it's taken. I think you'll be better pleased with what happens next.

SkyMaiden: This one's extra long (4,402 words, when you include the smut), just for you ^_^

Super Tifa and all my other readers: Thanks for making my hit count go up!

* * *

**Chapter 10: Valeria**

When Tifa was released from the hospital it was with the strict resolution that she have complete bed rest. This meant that Vincent did everything for her. He brought her breakfast, lunch, and dinner in bed and any other weird snacks in between that she craved. He would bring her books and magazines to read, and play cards with her, or simply talk with her about anything and everything as they had once been wont to do.

In this manner they spent the last few months of her pregnancy, reacquainting themselves with each other. Until their daughter decided to make her appearance. She came a little bit earlier than her due date, but Dr. Whitsun was not worried. In the last few months the baby had grown a great deal and the lungs that she had been concerned about had developed fully and properly. She used them to let out a lusty cry the moment they tasted their first breath of air, angrily expressing her displeasure at being removed from the warmth of her mother's womb and exposed to the harsh environment.

After she was cleaned and inspected, baby girl Valentine was placed into her mother's arms where she was received with great joy and affection.

Vincent looked on admiringly as Tifa counted ten baby fingers and then unwrapped the swaddled figure and counted ten baby toes. She looked exactly like Tifa; the same startlingly crimson eyes, small nose, full lips, even her hands were the miniature of Tifa's. Tifa cried unabashedly and Vincent felt his own eyes mist over with happiness and relief.

The first few weeks after they brought her home were difficult for Tifa, though. The baby kept her awake most of the night and there was nothing Vincent could do but watch on helplessly. When she cried out at night it was only Tifa's milk that could abate her hunger. It was only by listening to Tifa's familiar heartbeat that she could be soothed back to sleep. Vincent wondered if he would be able to create a similarly strong bond with the child. For the most part when he looked at her, he felt rather indifferent. But he had to force himself not to wonder what color her hair would be when some finally grew in. All she did was eat, sleep, drool, and need to get her diaper changed. And when she wasn't doing any of those things she would stare into space with unfocused eyes.

As if sensing his concern, Tifa asked him to hold the baby as much as possible, or change her diaper, or dress her in the cute frilly clothes that Marlene had sent, or pajamas at night. At first he was afraid that he would hurt her. Even though his prosthetic hand was remarkable in design and gave him a full range of motion, it made him feel a little clumsy sometimes. And she was so little and doll-like he thought sometimes she might break off. But it was in those times that he spent with her that he began to discover how amazing she was. Still new from the womb she could curl up into a little ball and fit comfortably in his large hand. He couldn't help but melt a little when she would grab onto his finger and hold on as if her life depended on it. She also loved to eat his hair, grabbing fistfuls of it and sucking happily until she fell asleep. Tifa joked that his hair tasted better than hers. He was most pleased when he was the first to have the pleasure of seeing her toothless, gummy baby smile. It made him feel more like her father. And having Vincent there to take care of the baby made things easier for Tifa.

But it was when he watched her with her mother that he became even more aware of Tifa and the changes that had taken place while he was away.

When Tifa had first been released from the hospital after her premature labor had been halted, he had agreed to move back in with her to take care of her, but he had slept in the guest bedroom. He was afraid to touch her, in part because of her condition, but still wary of resuming any real intimacy between them. Now sometimes when he watched her with the baby, rocking her to sleep, singing to her, or feeding her, Vincent would feel an embarrassing tightening in his loins and force himself to walk away. He wanted nothing more than to touch the creamy fullness of her breast, or kiss her soft wide mouth. And he was intoxicated by her smell, like milk and the gentle lavender soap that they used to wash the baby. He couldn't help but wonder about how things would be different if he and Tifa still shared a bed.

* * *

Vincent was distracted from the pleasure of the hot water pounding down on his taught muscles when he heard the baby cry and realized that she had been crying for a while. Tifa never let her cry that long without rushing to comfort her and find out what was wrong. He felt a knot of fear tighten up his stomach. "Tifa?" he called out, turning off the water. When he got no response he grabbed a towel and wrapped it around himself, rushing off to the nursery. He was startled when he walked in and saw her standing in the middle of the room in her robe holding the baby with tears streaming down her face. "Tifa?"

"She won't stop crying!" Tifa wailed. "I've fed her, and made sure she wasn't wet…and rocked her…and sang to her, but she won't stop!"

"Here, let me take her," he said soothingly, reaching out for the baby. "You're upset and she's probably just feeding off of your emotions." Tifa gladly handed over the crying child, and then sat down in the rocking chair exhaustedly. She stared at him as he began rocking the baby. In a few minutes the baby had calmed down to only whimpers, and then after that she had stuck her thumb in her mouth and was sleeping soundly. He set her down in the crib gently, and then turned to Tifa.

"Are you all right?"

Tifa sniffled. "You're wet." Vincent stepped toward her awkwardly, suddenly reminded of the fact that he was only in a towel, and still dripping wet.

"I am sorry. I thought there was something wrong…"

"Oh, there's something wrong, all right!" Tifa exclaimed cryptically. But she said nothing more.

"Do you wish to elaborate?" He had some idea, if the scent rolling off of her was any indication.

"No…well, I do…but I can't."

Vincent stared at her long and hard, noting the embarrassed pink tint to her cheeks. She looked so damn lovely sitting in the rocking chair with her huge terry cloth robe on and her toes peaking out from beneath it. He once again wished that things were different between them because then he would go over to her and lean down and press his lips against hers just to see if they were still as soft and full as he remembered them…he had to stop where his thoughts were going or even a towel wouldn't be able to hide his sudden intense interest in her. She wasn't ready, was she? And he wasn't either…or was he?

"I should go…get dressed," he said, lamely.

Tifa only nodded.

* * *

"Valeria and I had our 6-week check up today," Tifa said as they sat down for dinner a couple of evenings later.

Vincent knew that because he had reminded her of it before heading over to the weapon's shop for the day. When they first got married he had mostly helped Tifa run the bar by doing the behind-the-scenes business that kept it running smoothly and efficiently. But when they separated and he had moved to Rocket Town he was surprised to learn how much he enjoyed dealing in weapons. As soon as Tifa didn't need him to take care of her so diligently he had bought out an empty store and set up a weapon's shop in Kalm.

"How are things?" he asked.

"The baby and I are perfectly healthy. She's gaining weight at a good rate, and I'm losing it rather quickly as well."

"That's good." He smiled.

"Dr. Whitsun also told me it would be all right if you and I resumed sexual relations."

Vincent nearly choked on the tea he had been sipping. He hadn't been expecting that.

Tifa blushed delicately, making her skin glow even more beautifully than before. "If you don't want to, I understand."

"No! I do! I just—I wasn't sure how you felt about it."

"I want to. If you want to. I've wanted to since you moved back in—I used to have the most erotic dreams about you—being pregnant does that…I guess—but we…couldn't. And even then I wasn't sure if you wanted me."

"I do want you. More than anything. I don't think I could ever stop wanting you."

"But…I lost my figure…I still haven't quite regained it…"

Vincent shook his head incredulously. "All I have to do is look at you sometimes…or catch a whiff of your scent…" He leaned in close to her, until their faces were almost touching and whispered seductively in her ear. "You blossomed when you were carrying Valeria, and now you're just more…fuller, rounder, sexier. It's been a struggle to keep my hands off of you."

Tifa gasped in surprise at his words and how they affected her. She felt a tingling of pleasure in her nipples and he hadn't even touched her! "Really?"

"Yes."

"Then what do you say about this weekend? I could ask Yuffie to come take the baby for the night, and then you and I can be alone."

Vincent agreed without any further hesitation.

When the night came Tifa handed the baby over to Yuffie's eager arms somewhat reluctantly and listed instructions a mile long about what to do in case of emergency. Vincent too was a little reluctant to let her go for various reasons, but ultimately kissed her on the forehead and waved goodbye.

When he turned to Tifa, she smiled shyly and then told him to open a bottle of wine as she got ready. She dashed up the stairs to the bedroom so quickly that he could do nothing but comply. When he had finished a glass, he decided that he had waited long enough for whatever it was that Tifa was doing and picking up the bottle and two glasses, went up the stairs.

When he opened the door to the bedroom, he was surprised to find candles lit all around the room, and rose petals spread across the bed. But Tifa was no where in sight.

"I'm almost ready," she called from the bathroom. So he set down the glasses and poured wine into them, then settled himself comfortably on the bed.

When she came out, she was wearing black lingerie that emphasized her already voluptuous breasts and accentuated her other curves. Matching black stilettos highlighted her muscular calves and shapely thighs. Vincent's mouth went dry at the sight of her, so he took a sip of his wine, which of course did nothing to quench his thirst, and then remembered to offer her some. She sat down beside him on the bed and took it gratefully and gulped it down exposing how nervous she really was. When she was finished with that she poured herself another glass and was beginning to down that one, when Vincent grabbed it from her.

"You know it's been a while since the last time you've had alcohol. You keep drinking at that rate and you'll be drunk in no time."

"I know."

"Why are you so afraid?"

"Aren't you?"

"Desperately," he whispered.

Tifa sighed, knowing that Vincent deserved to have an answer to his question. He waited patiently for her to express herself. Finally, taking his hand into hers, she looked up into his eyes and began. "I'm afraid that I've messed things up so badly that they'll never be the same between us. I am your unfaithful cuckolding wife you know." She smiled wryly. Then she frowned. "I know you've forgiven me, but I can't forget."

Vincent nodded sympathetically. "I understand. I have forgiven you because I love you, but I'll never be able to forget. But I haven't forgotten my own sins. I once convinced a woman to commit adultery with me and for a time I thought I had gotten her pregnant. It only seems fair that I should have the same thing happen to me."

"No, it's not! Hojo got his revenge on you. He took your life and he desecrated your body. Nothing you have ever done was worth what he did to you."

"I have done worse as a Turk. There are many things in the past that I have done that I regret. And I fear there may be many more in the future. Who am I to judge you, especially when I love you so much?"

"If you forgive me, then can I ask you a question?"

"Of course you can. If we can't be honest with each other than our marriage has no chance, and I really want it to work."

"Okay. Then can you tell me what happened to your wedding ring?"

Surprised, Vincent looked down at his empty left hand. "I had forgotten I'd taken it off."

"Do you still have it?"

"Yes, of course. I took it off because I thought our marriage was over, but I could never bring myself to get rid of it. I guess there was always a part of me that hoped we could still make this work. And I was right." Vincent smiled, and Tifa sighed in relief.

"I'm glad. Can you put it back on? I want you to put it back on right now."

Vincent heartily agreed and quickly got up in search of his cloak. It was hanging up in the closet and his ring was still in the pocket where he had placed it so many months ago. He returned to Tifa's side and was about to put it back on himself when Tifa caught his hand and took the ring from him. Then she kissed his palm.

"With this ring I pledge my never-ending love and fidelity, and I promise that I will never give you a reason to take it off again." Then she seized his head and brought his mouth down towards hers for a devastatingly rough kiss. She thrust her tongue into his mouth hungrily, releasing all the pent up passion from the past months of separation. Vincent responded just as fervently.

* * *

The next night when it was time for bed, Vincent crawled in and wrapped his arms around Tifa thinking that he had never been happier in his life. Soon they were both asleep, cuddling. Until a shrill cry woke them up. Tifa immediately sat up as she was accustomed to doing, but Vincent stopped her from getting out of bed with a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I'll get her." He went to the bassinet, and carefully picked her up, cradling her in his arms. Recognizing her cry he laid her down gently next to Tifa. She sleepily bared her breast and offered it to the hungry child who latched on greedily. Watching mother and daughter made Vincent feel utterly content. Every moment he spent with his family was better than the last.


	11. A Chocobo themed Birthday Party

**Chapter 11: A Chocobo-themed Birthday Party**

**_Five years later…_**

No expense was spared for Valeria's fifth birthday. Vincent and Tifa had decorated the backyard to make it look like the Cosmo Canyon. Valeria was obsessed with all things Chocobo and Cosmo Canyon. She claimed that she wanted to become a sheriff and shoot all the bad guys when she grew up, just like those in the movies did. As party favors everyone had been given plastic water guns and chocoboy hats. The birthday girl was made sheriff with a badge and went around arresting her guests, or provoking shootouts that ended up getting everyone soaked. And as the coup de grâce they had gotten Valeria a chocobo pony of her own, and would allow all fifteen children who had been invited to the party, including Madison-Sierra who was now almost eight, to take rides on the gentle animal. Children were not the only guests who were enjoying themselves immensely in the warmth of the spring day. Tifa had also used the occasion as an opportunity for a reunion of sorts and Cid, Shera, Yuffie, Nanaki, Reeve and his wife Kate, Marlene and her boyfriend, Elmyra, and even Rude and Elena who had been happily married for eight years and whose daughter was in the same class as Valeria, were all in attendence. Barret could not be there because he had been tied up with work in Corel, but had sent his love and a huge package that his honorary granddaughter could not wait to open.

Tifa had just finished putting all five candles on her daughter's chocobo birthday cake when the doorbell rang. Not expecting anyone else, since all the other guests had already arrived, Tifa went to open the door and was startled to find Cloud standing there smiling at her. His hair was as spikey as ever, though a little bit longer, and his expression was full of warmth and eagerness. "Hello, Tifa," Cloud said. "Long time, no see, huh?"

Tifa wanted to demand to know what he was doing there, and why after all this time he had finally decided to show up, but she merely greeted him instead. "Hello, Cloud."

"May I come in?" he asked.

Instead of slamming the door in his face like she wanted to, she merely nodded and backed out of the doorway to allow him inside. After he entered the foyer, she closed the door behind him. When she turned around he was handing her a package wrapped in pink paper and a big red bow. "I heard it was your daughter's birthday, so I thought I'd bring her something."

Fear clenched Tifa's heart at the confirmation that he knew about her daughter. _He knows! _she thought. _But does he know that she is his? _Unsure of what to say, Tifa decided to that the polite thing was in order. "Thank you, Cloud. I'm sure Valeria will appreciate another present." Nervously, she added, "May I ask how you knew about the birthday party?"

"Valeria? Is that her name? It's really pretty. Hmm…as for your question, Barrett told me. I saw him before I came here. I was in the area and when I asked him about you, he told me that you were throwing a birthday party and that everyone from the old group would be there. I really wanted to see you, but I didn't want to come empty handed."

"Why? After all this time, why did you decide to come back?"

"Because I've found someone." Tifa hadn't been expecting that, although she wasn't sure what she really had been expecting. "She's the most incredible girl I've ever known…next to you of course." Cloud actually had the decency to blush.

"I…I'm glad," Tifa replied, confused by how relieved she felt.

"I wanted her to come here today so that she could meet everyone, but she thought it would be best if I came by myself. She's not shy, though, or anything like that, she just thought you all might want to see me first."

"That was thoughtful of her."

"She's always thinking about others' feelings before her own. I think you'll really like her, Tifa, once you meet her."

Tifa was about to say something more when she heard Vincent call to her from the kitchen. "Tifa? What's taking so long with the cake? We have a very hungry birthday girl here who wants to blow out some candles."

"I'm coming…I just got distracted," she replied. She didn't think it was a good idea for Cloud to be there. Vincent may have forgiven her for her infidelity, but she wasn't so sure that he had or would ever forgive Cloud. She could have throttled Barret for telling him that it would be all right if he came. But she couldn't blame him, he had no idea that she had cheated on Vincent with him and gotten pregnant with his child. She wanted nothing more than to kick Cloud out and tell him never to come back. Hadn't she told him that she never wanted to see him the last time they had been together? But that was more than five years ago, obviously he'd forgotten. Turning towards him…to do what, she didn't know…she saw Cloud step forward already making his way further into her home. Helplessly, she allowed him to follow her into the kitchen where she heard the familiar girlish giggling of her daughter.

Her breath caught. She didn't want him to see her. Would he take one look at her and know that she was his? For the most part Valeria's paternity was indiscernible to anyone who didn't already know. Everyone said that she was the spitting image of Tifa, and she had to agree. But there were some things about her that reminded her of Cloud, like the way she scratched her head when she was confused, and the way her brow would furrow and her lips would frown whenever she got angry. If Cloud thought to count back, then he could suspect, and if he suspected, then he could very probably see.

The only thing he saw, though, was Vincent's startled face as he held his daughter in his arms. She was climbing all over him like a monkey and Vincent was a tree. Vincent went rigid at the sight of Cloud, and then he turned his gaze on Tifa. She flinched when she saw the accusation in his eyes.

"Hello, Vincent," Cloud said. "You seem as startled as Tifa was. I'm sure you're wondering what I'm doing here." Vincent didn't say anything so Cloud continued. "I just wanted to catch up with everyone and Barrett told me you'd all be here, so I came. I even brought your daughter a gift. Tifa's got it." At the reminder that she was holding a present, she set it down on the table next to all the other gifts.

Valeria had been watching Cloud with fascination. When Cloud stopped speaking, she looked up at Vincent and asked, "Who's that man, daddy? He looks just like a chocobo with those spikes on his head."

Before Vincent could answer, Cloud had moved in closer. "My name is Cloud, and I'm an old friend of your mommy and daddy's." He reached out a hand for Valeria to shake in greeting. Vincent wanted to rip Clouds fingers off at the use of the word "friend." Friends did not desert their lovers, leaving them heartbroken and miserable, only to return in order to try to ruin a happy marriage with propositions and declarations of feelings that came much too late, only to leave again after he had gotten them pregnant.

"Can I pet your hair?" Valeria asked. "Is it as soft as a chocobo's? I like chocobos!"

"Valeria!" Tifa scolded. "It's impolite to call someone a chocobo."

Cloud chuckled. "That didn't stop you. But then you could call me anything you wanted, and I wouldn't have minded," he replied with a small intimate smile. Tifa gasped indignantly.

"Tifa, why don't you take Valeria outside?" Vincent began before Tifa could say anything. "I'll bring out the cake in a bit, but first, I think Cloud and I should have a talk."

Tifa shook her head. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Are we going to cut my cake now?" Valeria piped in cheerfully.

"We will soon, sweetie," Tifa responded, reaching out to take the girl into her arms.

"But I want my cake now!" she whined.

"We can't cut cake inside, now can we? We have to go outside so everyone can sing 'Happy Birthday' to you. Let's go outside now, and daddy will be right behind with the cake, now _won't he?_" Tifa directed her sharp gaze towards Vincent who was still looking at Cloud as if he wanted to clobber him. Cloud paid Vincent no mind and was staring unabashedly at Valeria in Tifa's arms.

"She doesn't look anything like you, Vincent…" Tifa gasped in fear at his side, once again wondering how much Cloud knew and if he had really come back to stake a claim, and end up destroying lives in the process. But Cloud had a faraway look in his eyes, as if he wasn't really looking at his daughter. "She looks exactly like her mother at that age."

And seeing Valeria had sent him into the past when he was just a lonely little boy who fancied himself in love with the beautiful girl next door. At the time, he didn't know how different their lives would be when they both grew up; he had only been consumed with his adolescent crush on Tifa and doing whatever he could to impress her. For a long time after he'd left her, he felt guilty for not keeping his promise. But as he watched Tifa's daughter now, he no longer felt that way. He was right to leave her if it meant that she would be happy with Vincent and have the family that she always wanted. And he was much happier with his new girl.

Misinterpreting the look in Cloud's eyes, Vincent gave in to his feelings of anger and resentment and punched the unsuspecting Cloud, sending him toppling to the ground. "You think you can just come back here as if you haven't been gone for almost six years and take what's mine?!" Vincent shouted. "I won't let you! I'll send you to the Lifestream myself before I let that happen!" He kicked Cloud in the gut for good measure. "Get _out_ of my house!"

"Vincent, stop!" Tifa cried out in alarm, setting Valeria down on the ground.

"Daddy, why did you hit that man? I thought he was your friend?"

"What the fu—heck is going on here?" Cid yelled, coming inside to see what all the commotion was about.

Vincent stood over Cloud, chest heaving, crimson eyes gleaming dangerously.

"Cloud?!" Cid exclaimed.

Cloud sat up and touched his jaw tenderly. He darted accusing eyes up at Tifa. "You told him?"

_Told him that I slept with you?_ "What did you expect? He's my husband."

Impatient that Cloud was still sitting there, Vincent reached down to grab him by the scruff of his neck only to be blocked with angry fists. "Don't touch me again, Valentine. It's not my fault your wife chea—"

"Cloud!" Shera exclaimed, walking into the room followed by Yuffie and Marlene.

"Cloud!" Marlene shouted, running towards him and falling to her knees to envelope him in a fierce hug. "Why are you on the ground? You look like you've been in a fight."

Cid walked over to Vincent and gently pulled him away from the downed man. Tifa grabbed Valeria's hand and took her outside, too angry and upset to look at either Vincent or Cloud. "Mommy, why did daddy just hit that man? I've never seen daddy do that before. He says that hitting people is bad except for inside the fence. But Cloud's nowhere near a fence. Are you going to put my daddy in time out? Whenever I do bad things I have to have time out. Am I still going to get cake if daddy's in time out? I wanna ride my chocobo…"


	12. Confessions and Threats

**Chapter 12: Confessions and Threats**

Cloud left abruptly after Marlene helped him get up. Marlene wondered what caused the fight. Everyone else who had been in the kitchen knew and wondered why exactly Cloud had come back.

As he walked back to the inn that he and his girlfriend were staying in, Cloud himself began to wonder why he had come back. It had felt like a good idea. After more than five years had passed he had missed everyone. He had finally realized that despite his loner tendencies, he still enjoyed being around other people the most. And the other people he most enjoyed being around were still his friends; Barret, Nanaki, Yuffie, Cid, Vincent and especially Tifa. He found that he spent most of his conversations with his new girlfriend, regaling stories about the time he spent in AVALANCHE. So when she had finally asked him if he missed them, he had to be honest and tell her that he did, and she suggested that he go see them.

At first he had balked at the suggestion. He thought that with the way things had ended with Tifa, it wouldn't be a good idea to come back into her life. But he couldn't give Eunice a good reason for why he didn't want to go, since he had not told her about how he'd had an affair with Tifa. So she convinced him that he owed it to himself to go back. Now, he _knew_ it had been a bad idea.

Cloud could understand why Vincent was so upset. He had slept with his wife, and now he had come waltzing back into their lives like nothing ever happened. That was a bad move on his part. But he hadn't thought Tifa would tell him. She had no reason to; she had made it clear that it was a one time thing and she still loved her husband and he was never supposed to be coming back. It was their secret.

So why had she told him? It was a nagging thought that wouldn't go away.

When he opened the door to his hotel room, he was immediately accosted by his girlfriend. Neecie was a cheerful, exuberant young doctor, whose energy and thirst for life never ceased to amaze Cloud. "I missed you while you were gone."

"You should have come. You missed all the fireworks." Cloud grinned sardonically, pointing to his face.

"Ooh, baby! What happened?" Neecie exclaimed, green eyes going wide at the dark bruise that was beginning to form on his fair cheek.

"Vincent hit me."

"Why would he do that?"

"Because I slept with Tifa."

"What? When?" She asked these questions out of curiosity, but without any condemnation.

"Right before I left the last time. It's kind of the _reason_ I left the last time." Cloud sighed. He hadn't told anyone about what had happened. He sat down on the bed and then pulled her down next to him. "You know the reason that I left the first time was because I didn't feel like I was being fair to Tifa. We had been together for a while, but it felt like things just weren't working. I was so confused about who I was then and I still had feelings for Aeris. And she knew it, and I hurt her. I thought I would hurt her less if I left. Then when I came back to try to make things work out between us, she was happy and married to Vincent. I didn't want to mess that up, so I left again…no…the truth was that I was so blinded by jealousy that I couldn't see straight…" Cloud laughed mirthlessly with that statement. "I was so angry at myself for leaving, and Tifa for moving on without me even though she told me she'd wait, and boy was I mad at Vincent…I kept picturing him with Tifa…imagining them…together…so I left…but what you don't know…what I didn't think anyone knew…was that I came back again. When I couldn't take it anymore, I called Tifa and told her that it was urgent that I see her. And when she came I told her that I loved her, and I always had, and I was so sorry for the way that I had hurt her, but I would make it up to her. She was really mad. She tried to hit me. She told me that she couldn't trust me. She reminded me that she had a husband that she loved and that she was finally happy…but I think she was lying a little. And when she finally stopped struggling, I just leaned down and kissed her, and was surprised when she didn't bite my tongue off. I thought for a little while, for a moment at least, that we could finally be together. But then she was telling me that it had been a mistake, that she was sorry that she had done it, and that she never wanted to see me again. I was devastated. I told her that I would die without her. And I'll never forget what she said next: 'Then maybe you'll finally get your chance to be with Aeris.' Then she left."

"You're not still in love with her, are you?" Once again her questions were asked with an objective tone, offering up no condemnation, only understanding. It was one of the things that Cloud appreciated so much about her. He shook his head.

"No. After she did that to me I went into a downward spiral. I drank, I used mako, I would fight with anything to make a couple extra gil to feed my addiction, or hurt me so bad the pain would distract me. And then that's where you came along. You saw something in me that I couldn't see anymore, and you didn't give up on me. You convinced me to join a twelve-step program and cared enough to make sure that I went. And by doing that I realized that my obsession with Tifa wasn't healthy, and that what I was really doing was substituting my feelings of guilt for love, thinking it would be safer and more noble. But it wasn't. And I've come to realize that I didn't really love Tifa, not the way she deserved, and that I was killing myself trying to force myself to be that kind of man. But I don't have to do that with you. That's why I'm so glad I met you."

"You are _lucky_ you found me. That's what you are," Neecie joked.

"That I am," Cloud agreed. He pushed a mahogany lock off of her forehead and leaned in. "You are the most amazing woman to put up with me. How could I not lo—"

Neecie pulled away, cutting him off with a finger over his lips. "What did I say about saying things you don't mean?"

"I do mean it."

"I don't believe you." But her gentle smile was without reproach. "At least not yet…" She leaned forward and captured his lips in kiss.

* * *

Tifa wasn't talking to Vincent. Even though when Vincent brought the cake out and he and Tifa silently agreed to pretend that nothing had happened in order not to disturb the festivities, she said less than five words to him the entire rest of the day. Everyone noticed the tension between the two, even those who had not been privy to the fight. It put a damper on the whole rest of the event. Most people could not wait to leave.

Tifa washed dishes in the kitchen after she put the exhausted Valeria to bed with Madison-Sierra who was spending the night along with her parents. Vincent was outside with Cid taking down decorations. Tifa would have locked him out in her anger, if Cid weren't there with him. Shera approached Tifa and helped her dry, determined to have a talk with Tifa. Even though their friendship had cooled somewhat after Shera discovered that Tifa had cheated on Vincent, they still considered each other confidants, especially since their daughters were such close friends.

"I know you're trying to pretend like nothing happened, today. But something did," Shera began. "Something very important. What are you going to do about it?" she asked pointedly.

"There's nothing to do about it. I think Vincent made it clear that Cloud is not welcome here."

"That's what you're upset about?" Shera asked incredulously. "That Vincent ruined your chances of rekindling a friendship with Cloud? I can't _believe_ your gall!"

"No! That's not it!" Tifa exclaimed slamming a dish into the sink and sending up a surge of soapy water. "I'm mad that because of Vincent, Cloud was reminded that we slept together. I was counting on him not giving a damn and pretending like nothing happened! He would have as long as I didn't mention anything. But nooooooooooo! Vincent had to go and be an alpha-male. Now all Cloud has to do is count back and he'll _know_ that Valeria is his! And he can't find out! He can't ever find out!"

"He's bound to find out eventually. Did you think you could hide it forever?" Shera chided.

"Yes! He wasn't even supposed to come back! He was supposed to be dead in some ditch somewhere trying to find his way back to that goddamned flower girl Cetra!"

"But he's back now. And you're going to have to deal with the consequences of your actions for once..."

Tifa glared at Shera suspiciously. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm saying it was a rotten thing of you to lie about Val's paternity."

"I did that for Vincent, so he could be her father," Tifa replied, defensively.

"No, you did it for yourself," was Shera's cool reply. "You didn't want anyone to know that you had screwed around. But now the truth is catching up to you. Cloud's back and he deserves to know."

Tifa was surprised by the venom in Shera's words. But she shouldn't have been. She had always known that Shera was Vincent's greatest champion. And a part of her knew that Shera was right, that she hadn't deserved to have been forgiven so easily by Vincent, so why should Shera have forgiven her? But she would never, _ever_ agree that Cloud had a right to her daughter. Vincent was her father and she wouldn't let anyone take that, too, away from him. "Cloud doesn't deserve anything! If he wanted to be a father, he could have been. I spent years with him, and not once did he ever say that he wanted a family with me. He gave up his chance to be a father. And Valeria has a father. A wonderful, kind, loving man who _wants_ to be her father. I'm not going to ruin that just so Cloud can come back in and ruin our lives."

"You don't get to decide that."

"Yes, I do," Tifa ground out through her teeth.

Shera shrugged nonchalantly. "Well, then you had better _decide_ to tell Cloud yourself, or I will do it for you."

Completely shocked, Tifa could do nothing but stand there and stare at the other woman.

The two women were still standing there glaring at each other when Vincent and Cid came in. "What's going on?" Cid asked warily.

"Your wife just threatened to tell Cloud the truth unless I do."


	13. Anxious Heart

A/N: So this is the last chapter that I had posted six years ago. The next chapter will be all brand spanking new! As always, reviews are welcome and appreciated!

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**Chapter 14: Anxious Heart**

"What the hell are you talking about Shera?" asked Cid, throwing a confused look at his wife.

"You know that I haven't liked lying to everyone about Valeria's paternity," Shera replied defensively. "And now with Cloud back it just doesn't feel right to continue to keep this secret."

"But you agreed that you would!" Tifa exclaimed. "You've done it for five years already, what's the big deal about it now? If it's Cloud that you're worried about, then don't talk to him. It's as simple as that!"

"No, it isn't. It's the principle. Cloud is Valeria's father and he has the right to know."

"But why? When all the truth coming out will do is ruin everyone's lives, especially my daughter's!"

"It wouldn't have if you had been honest in the first place."

"I didn't even know where he was!"

"You could have tried harder—"

"And then what? Dragged Cloud back to be a father to a child he didn't want—"

"It doesn't matter what he wanted, he might have changed his mind. But now you'll never know—"

"Ladies! Please. This arguing is pointless," Cid interrupted. "We can't go back and change the past. All we can do is deal with the here and now. And right now we ought to think of what is best for Valeria."

"Which is finding out the truth—"

"Which is keeping her paternity secret—" Shera and Tifa said at the same time.

"Cid," Tifa pleaded, turning to him, "You can't let her do this! She'll ruin everyone's lives. Valeria's, Vincent's, Cloud's…he's got a new girlfriend, he said. How will she feel about Cloud having a five year old daughter?"

"Not to mention your own life will be ruined," Shera interjected.

"Shera, please—" Cid began.

"Don't you dare take her side over mine!" Shera shouted. "_I'm_ your wife. And you know I'm right! How would you feel if I had never told you about Madison? What if you had missed the first five years of her life? Wouldn't you think you had the right to know?"

"Shera, this is different. You and I were married—"

"No! It's not different. Except what Tifa did was worse. She was married to Vincent and she had another man's child. And she never had to deal with that."

"I know it was worse, Shera," Tifa agreed solemnly. "But once I found out that I was pregnant, I had to put my baby's needs first. And what she needed was a father who loved her and wanted her, and Vincent is that father. Cloud isn't, and never will be!"

"But only if you don't tell him!"

Throughout the whole argument Vincent had been silent even as Cid helplessly tried to referee the two women. He too had been debating about whether to tell Cloud the truth, weighing the different arguments. He didn't want Cloud to know. He didn't want to have to share Valeria the way he had had to share Tifa's divided heart. He didn't want Valeria to have to choose between him and Cloud. He didn't want the shame of having everyone know that he was a cuckold. And he hated Cloud. He hated Cloud for stealing his wife and having the audacity to come into his home and pretend like nothing had happened. But in the end by keeping such a big secret, he had become no better than Cloud. And he already had enough sins staining his soul. It was a sin that obviously weighed heavily on Shera's mind as well, and by burdening her with the secret as well, he only doubled his own sin. Those sins could not easily be ignored.

Coming to a quick decision, he knew what he had to do. He turned around silently and left the room without anyone noticing.

Tifa tried to stall. "All right, Shera. I'll tell Cloud. But only after I talk with Vincent. This decision will not only affect me and Valeria, but him as well. Will you give me a few days to talk it over with my husband?"

Shera was stunned into silence by Tifa's sudden willingness to do as she demanded. She nodded first and then cleared her throat. "All right, I won't tell him until after you've spoken with Vincent."

Tifa turned to Cid. "Where is he, Cid?"

Cid looked behind him where Vincent had stood only moments before. "He was over there, but he must have…left."

Interpreting his words differently than what he might have intended, Tifa took off running, through the hallway and up the stairs to her bedroom, leaving Cid and Shera to discuss matters themselves.

Cid looked at his wife sympathetically. "Shera, I know you don't like lying, and I'm sorry that I ever told you the truth and brought you into this mess, but it's not your decision to make. You agreed to that when we all decided not to tell anyone the truth five years ago when Vallie was born. And you need to honor that, no matter how hard it may be."

"I know you're right." Shera sighed. "But you should have heard her earlier going on about how Cloud had no right to know, and that he wasn't a good father. It enrages me how self-righteous she can get when _she_ was the one who cheated! If she didn't want Cloud to be the father she shouldn't have slept with him!"

"That's a good point," Cid agreed. "But Vincent forgave her for that a long time ago. Isn't it about time that you forgave her too? You've forgiven me for just as bad."

"You _never_ cheated on me," she responded indignantly.

"But I was an asshole to you."

"There's a big difference between being an ass and cheating. One I can forgive, and the other I can't."

"I feel just as badly about the way I treated you as if I had cheated on you."

"That's because despite your rough exterior, inside you're a sensitive man who cares deeply about the way he behaves towards the people he cares about. But trust me, if you had cheated there's no way I could have forgiven you." She said it so seriously that Cid knew it was a warning, not that the thought had ever crossed his mind.

"Good thing I've never cheated…although there was this one time when Vincent and I got really drunk…" He grinned.

"Gods, you are incorrigible!" Shera grinned back.

"But you love me anyway."

"Yes, I do."

Sobering up slightly he asked, "So will you do me this favor and agree to keep this secret forever if Vincent and Tifa ask you to?"

Shera sighed. "I will. But only because you asked me to."

* * *

Tifa found Vincent in their bedroom packing. "What are you doing?" she demanded even though she knew exactly what he was doing and why. Just as he had done before when he found out that she had an affair. He was running away. Not that she could blame him.

"I'm doing what's best for you and Valeria. Her real father is back in the picture now and I don't want to get in the way."

"You are her real father. In every way that matters."

"Except for the fact that she isn't mine." His laugh was wry and humorless.

"Since when has that mattered to you? Does that mean you don't love her anymore because she isn't yours?" she asked incredulously.

"You know I do!" he exclaimed angrily.

"Then what's the problem? We can go on just the way things have been and no one will know or suspect."

"What about Shera?"

"She's had it out for me ever since she found out that I cheated. But you can convince her not to tell. I know you can. All you have to do is tell her that this is what you want."

"And is that what _you_ want?" he asked pointedly.

"Of course it is!"

"Forgive me for my skepticism, but I believed that before and got burned…twice."

"You think I want to be with Cloud again?"

"Perhaps."

"But why? Haven't I proven to you in the past five years how much I love you?"

He had finished packing by then and strode toward the door without answering her question. But Tifa blocked him, shutting the door and standing in his way.

"Move, Tifa."

"No, I won't. I won't let you walk away from me. I know that I hurt you terribly, and because of my betrayal I've put you in this terrible position right now, but you said that you forgave me and I believed you. And if that's true then you have to know that I love you and only you. Cloud may be back, but I'm with you because I love you."

"It was easy to believe that you loved me when he wasn't around, but underneath it all I wondered what would happen when he came back and claimed you and his baby."

"What about earlier today? You _hit_ him because you didn't want to let him steal me away again. Now you're just going to walk away?"

"I'm the only reason you're not telling him the truth about his child. Without me you wouldn't have any problem with Shera telling the truth."

"That's because I love you and don't want to hurt you anymore than I already have. If he finds out he'll have rights; to see her, to spend time with her, and every moment that she spends with him is a moment that he's taken away from you. I don't want that for you. Not after everything you've done for both me and her. You've been there for every smile, cry, tooth, step, word…and you did it all because you love her even though she's not your flesh and blood. By rights you could have hated her for what she represented—my deepest betrayal of you. But you never did. I can't let you walk away from that."

"You have to."

"No!"

"Don't you understand that I couldn't bear losing you to him again!" There. He said it. It wasn't really his sense of honor that had him willing to walk away from the woman he loved. Or his guilt about asking Shera to lie for him. Not really.

"I don't want to be with him!"

"You say that now, but _every_ time he's come back into your life he's wreaked havoc. You've been connected to him since your childhood and now you have a child together. I can't compete with that, and I never should have even tried." Vincent had never looked more vulnerable than he did at that moment.

Tifa shook her head vehemently. "Maybe we are connected…by a horrible shared history, but that's it. Cloud has only made me miserable, but you have given me happiness beyond what I have ever deserved. That's the kind of connection that I want, and that is so much stronger than anything that I've ever had with Cloud. You have to believe that, Vincent."

He closed his eyes. His heart pounded in his ears. He wanted to believe her so badly. In the preceding years she had given him no reason to doubt her ever. His only doubts came from his own feelings of inadequacy and his own sense of doom because whenever he had ever loved before, it had become tarnished when it wasn't returned and was betrayed. While he had gone deep inside of himself to a place where such a feeling of forgiveness was possible, he could not forget what she had done, nor could he completely trust that it would not happen again. It may have been her fault for betraying him in the first place, although after Lucrecia he knew that he would always have been a bit mistrustful no matter how faithful Tifa had been, but with her consequent infidelity he found it impossible not to fear the worse. Ever since Cloud had returned he could feel an invisible hand cold as ice slowly squeezing his heart, and a dark voice whispering in his ear and telling him that he was on the brink of losing everything that he held dear once again.

"Vincent…?" Tifa queried.

He opened his eyes again and the sight of her tear-streaked face made his throat constrict painfully with unshed tears of his own.

"Vincent, you have to believe me," she cried, lifting her hands to the lapels of his shirt and pulling him down to kiss her. He gave in bonelessly, letting her convince him with her mouth how much she loved him. He groaned with the all-consuming desire he had felt for her from the moment he had realized that she could feel the same way about him as she snaked her hands around his neck and into the hair at the nape of his neck.

He wondered if he should resist the attraction he felt for her. When he could not believe her words, he always gave into the intoxicating taste of her. She always gave herself so sweetly and completely to him, except for those first few months after she'd slept with Strife, and he could feel the guilt eating away at her, making her shrink from his touch, and he had known without a doubt that something was wrong. And the guilt still ate at her sometimes, and every time she held back from him he wondered. It was a bitter draught to swallow.

He couldn't help but wonder now. Did she feel obliged to him? Was she only using him to protect her from loneliness, as a companion and helpmate as she raised her daughter? He suspected that it was the original reason why she had become involved with him after Cloud left her, and he had accepted it, hoping that no matter what her initial feelings had been, they had eventually changed into the deep love and desire that he had always felt for her. At first he had believed it was true and he had been one of the happiest men on the Planet. Then she had cheated and he hadn't known what to believe anymore. He didn't want to feel that way anymore.

"Tifa, stop," he said pulling her arms from around his neck. "This isn't the right way to go about this. We'll only end up hurting each other more."

"No, Vincent, you've never hurt me. And if this is the only way I can convince you the way that I feel, then I'll use any means necessary."

He stared down at her, eyes filled with passion and fear and willed himself to believe her. If he wanted proof he would never find it. There was nothing that she could ever do or say to make him believe her. He either trusted her, or he didn't. He still wasn't sure which one he felt.

"May the gods help you if you do go back to Cloud Strife because I'll cut out your lying heart myself." He pushed her up against the door and lowered his head to capture her mouth in a hungry devouring kiss. Tifa was surprised at his aggressiveness, but submitted to his punishing kisses, knowing it was her due.

"No one else had better not kiss you like this," he told her gruffly as he lifted her up off the ground and splayed her legs so that he could step between them. His lips on the skin at her collarbone were hot like fire, branding her as his own.

"Or touch you like this." His hands explored her body, first exposing a breast to his warm grasp, then shoving aside her panties and fingering her possessively.

"Only me." When she was ready he dropped his pants.

"Only you, Vincent," Tifa gasped as he entered her with one powerful thrust.


	14. Desperation

A/N: After more than six years I'm finally going to update with a brand new chapter! I'm feeling pretty anxious about it, I mean, I've had six years to worry about it lol, but I'm excited too. Please be kind and leave a review!

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Vincent couldn't sleep. Even after Tifa had finally given into her exhaustion and lay in his arms boneless in slumber, he had remained awake, his thoughts roiling about in his head, unable to give him peace. So he slowly disentangled himself from Tifa's embrace, careful not to wake her, and dressed quickly.

His first stop was to check on his daughter. She was asleep curled up next to Madison. Despite their differences in ages, they were very similar in height and build, though one was fair while the other was dark-haired. Vincent wondered whether Valeria's accelerated growth had anything to do with the mako Cloud had been exposed to. It was one of a million details about her that reminded him of her parentage. Sometimes he forgot, though. When she would come running to him, crying about a scraped knee, or hurt finger, and look up at him with those big red eyes and say, "Daddy, please kiss it and make it better," or when she called him "daddy" for any reason. He didn't want to have to give that up.

But maybe he didn't deserve it. Maybe he had never deserved it and that was why his ability to have children had been taken away from him. But by some miracle after he had been experimented on and thrown in a coffin to rot for thirty years, he had been awakened. And when he awoke he had eventually been given a chance at a new life, one where he wasn't a hired mercenary, or a lackey bodyguard, but a savior of the planet. And for a while he'd had the love of a good woman, that is until her ex-lover came back into the picture and got her pregnant…that part hadn't been so miraculous. But in the middle of all the heartbreak, he had been given the chance to be a father to a beautiful little girl. He didn't want that bond to end, even though he knew it was selfish. But how could he make himself give that up? He had been ready to, earlier that evening. He saw the future written on the wall, and it didn't include him. Cloud would find out about Valeria and then he and Tifa would get back together. It would be what was best for everyone…but him. He would just drift from continent to continent aimlessly searching for what he knew could never be his. Only Tifa had stopped him. Distracted him. Maybe he hadn't been so ready to give this all up, or she wouldn't have so easily toppled his determination to leave. He had lost so much already, didn't he deserve to have some happiness in his life? The only thing that stood in his way was one man.

How very tempting it would be to eliminate him from their lives once and for all. When he had been a Turk, wasn't that what he had been ordered to do? Take out threats and get rid of the evidence? How easy would it be to find out the location of Cloud's hotel room, then sneak in while he was gone, set his trap and wait for the ex-SOLDIER to return, and then when he was sleeping, simply inject him with a deadly dose of Kiss of Death and then sneak out without anyone ever knowing?

But what satisfaction would there be in that? What he really wanted to do was make him suffer, feel the same pain and hurt he felt when he first found out about the affair—make him bleed, and tear his flesh until he confessed to all of his sins. He could do it with his bare hands…

Vincent smiled with grim satisfaction. _It would be so easy_, he thought, but then he would truly become a monster, and how would he ever be able to look his daughter in the face knowing that he had killed her father? What if she found out that he wasn't really her father? And deep down, he knew that it was a possibility. Too many people knew about the secret and someone could accidentally let something slip. What if she asked about the identity of her real father? How would she feel if he lied and said that Cloud had never wanted her, so he had taken his place? He would never want her to feel that her own flesh and blood had rejected her. But at the same time, how could he tell her the truth? That he had stolen what rightfully belonged to another man, and he had kept him from her, not giving him a chance to even know of her existence, or his relationship to her. What if she then hated him for it and rejected _him_? He couldn't take the risk. He wouldn't give her up; not if he could help it.

Full of resolve, he reluctantly gave up the idea of killing Cloud, but that didn't mean that he couldn't get rid of him another way. He didn't really like the thought of what he had to do, but there was no other way. Even as he dread it, he knew that he had better do it sooner rather than later.

He made his way down the stairs and into the kitchen where he knew there would be a scrap of paper for him to write a note on to let Tifa know that he had gone out. But leaving a note turned out to be unnecessary since Shera was already downstairs with a pot of coffee.

"Would you like one?" Shera offered, getting up to grab a coffee mug from the cabinet.

"No, thank you," Vincent declined politely.

Shera sat back down, staring at him with concerned eyes. "Did Tifa convince you to keep quiet?"

For long moments Vincent debated about how to respond. "If I asked you not to tell, would you keep the secret?" Vincent finally asked, breaking the silence.

"I see she has," Shera concluded.

"She told me that if I asked you to, you would keep quiet."

Shera scoffed. "She has some nerve expecting me not to tell Cloud the truth."

"But she is right, isn't she? Even if you won't keep this secret for her, you'd keep it for me, wouldn't you?" Vincent asked softly.

Shera prevaricated. "I…I don't know Vincent. You're asking a lot of me. I just don't understand how you can forgive Tifa so easily after everything she's done!"

"Do you think it's been easy for me? You know that it hasn't. You saw everything that I went through when I found out that she was pregnant and the child wasn't mine! And you know how broken and cut off I was when AVALANCHE first found me in that coffin. Did Cid ever tell you about Lucrecia?"

"I know that she was Sephiroth's mother and that you loved her. But Cid never told me the details. I'm not even sure he knows all the details himself."

"No, I guess I didn't tell him everything."

"Will you tell me now? Maybe if you tell me I'll be able to understand why you can forgive Tifa so easily."

"I'm afraid I might just leave you even more confused than you already are."

"Tell me anyway. Let me decide."

"If I tell you, will you promise not to tell Cloud?"

Shera hesitated. Even if Vincent hadn't decided to be so forthcoming about his past, she had already decided to agree, even though she still felt that it would be better for everyone in the end if the truth came out. Especially for Cloud, since he deserved to know. But she also knew it would hurt Vincent, and she didn't want to hurt him anymore than he had already been. "All right. I promise to keep your secret."

"Thank you." He closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. "Now to tell you about Lucrecia. Her name was Lucrecia Crescent. I met her when I was assigned to be her bodyguard in Nibelheim. I was a Turk, and I was the best, and they wanted their best on their top secret experiments. She worked with Dr. Gast and of course Hojo. Mainly I was a sentinel, waiting for her while she worked in the basement of the Shinra Mansion. But I would also escort her to and from the Inn. And sometimes I would escort her on walks through the forest. It was on these walks that she would make fun of me for being just a "suit" and not having a fancy Oxbridge degree like she did. But instead of making me hate her, it made me insanely mad _about_ her. She made me think, she made me question my life, and the desires and goals that I had, and I would have done anything to try to impress her. And of course none of it worked. It simply amused her. But I fancied myself in love with her. And for a while I thought she loved me too."

"What made you think she was in love with you?"

"My arrogance. I knew that she wanted me. She would often come to my room at the inn. She would come in the dead of the night and always left before the morning. I should have realized what she was doing sooner. But I was blinded by my own desire."

"Realized what?"

"That she was married to Hojo."

"You didn't know she was married?"

"Not at first. But when I found out, it didn't stop me."

_She always came to see him on a schedule. Like clockwork, she was. Even when he begged her to be spontaneous, she refused. But she came to him unexpectedly that night. He had begun to feel that there was something bothering her, that she was pulling away from him, so he was surprised to see her._

_She had breezed past him as he opened the door. No kiss, no touch, she wouldn't even look up at his face. She sat down on the edge of his bed and her gaze remained fixated on the floor. He crossed his arms and leaned back against the closed door. He stood there for a while looking at her downturned profile, waiting for her to explain her sudden appearance._

_Eventually, she began. "I have something to tell you, and I have a feeling you're not going to like it."_

_Vincent shrugged his shoulders noncommittally. "You tell me, and I'll be the judge."_

_She finally looked up at him, her large green eyes a pool of sadness. "I'm married."_

_That caused him to stand up straight. He pushed himself away from the door to stand directly in front of her. "Married? To whom? For how long? And why the hell did you decide to wait until now to tell me?"_

_"I married Hojo when I was eighteen—"_

_"Hojo? Really. I would have thought that you had better taste."_

_"Hojo has a remarkable mind. We have similar interests. And one of these days he will become a successful scientist, the likes of which the world has never seen before."_

_"Even better than Gast?"_

_"Yes, even better than Dr. Gast."_

_"You're right. I don't like it," Vincent said frowning. He turned away from her and walked over to his desk where he picked up a decanter of Corelian brandy and poured himself a drink. "Would you like some?"_

_She shook her head. "I'm telling you because I think someone suspects that you and I are having an affair."_

_"Who?"_

_"It doesn't matter who. The important thing is that I have to give you up."_

_"Give me up? Like I'm some sort of ransom for the safe return of your happy marriage. I don't think so." Vincent shook his head. He suddenly knelt before her, grabbing her hands and pressing them to his chest. "You don't love Hojo or you wouldn't have come to me all these months. Why stay in this farce of a marriage? I love you and I want to be with you. Leave him and be with me. I'll even marry you if you want."_

_"You don't understand, Vincent," she pleaded. "I do love him. He's a brilliant man, much more than anyone ever gives him credit for. Even me. And I never meant to hurt him. This was a mistake." She tried to pull away from him, but he held her in a vice grip. For long moments she struggled against him until suddenly Vincent relaxed his grip. _

_Changing tactics, knowing that physical strength would never convince her, he gentled his voice and leaned in close to her. His eyes were like magnets, drawing her eyes to his automatically with the force of his gaze. He reached up to brush a strand of her hair away from her face and caress the smooth skin on her forehead. "If you don't want to hurt him, then why are you here, hmmm…?" his voice a low rumble. "Why are you here with me, letting me touch you like this?" he asked brushing his fingers lightly against her neck. "Or this?" This time he trailed his fingers downwards to the exposed skin at the top of her shirt. She let out a quivery breath. "Or kiss you like this?" He touched his lips lightly to hers, recognizing the surrender in her slack, and weakened limbs. She could never resist him. Not when he put his mind to it._

"We continued to see each other for weeks after she told me. Before I had been unaware, but after that I was complicit in deceiving her husband. How does that make me any different from Cloud? The cuckold-er becomes the cuckold-ee. But as much as I tried to convince her to leave Hojo, she always refused. After I finally realized that even if she didn't really love him, she would never leave him, I told myself that it didn't matter to me as long as she was happy. I asked to be transferred to another mission, and was sent to Midgar to oversee some highly sensitive information regarding the mako reactors being built there. I was doing my best to forget her and even had some success at it when I got a letter from Professor Gast telling me that Lucrecia was pregnant.

"I couldn't figure out why he would tell me such a thing, but I think now he knew somehow that she and I were having an affair and he wanted me to stop the experiments. I later found out that when he could no longer go along with President Shinra and Hojo's plans for creating super-soldiers he was banished to Icicle Inn where he later met Ifalna, got married and fathered Aeris.

"Anyway, I rushed back to Nibelhiem against my better judgment. I knew that there was only the slightest of chances that I was the father since we had always been careful, and I believed that if I really were the father Lucrecia would have told me. But really I had been looking for excuses to go back and see her and that was it. I got there just as she went into labor. When I found her…I thought she was dead…I picked her up and carried her to the hospital. I waited outside her room…heard her scream in pain…Eventually a doctor came out. He told me that she had almost died giving birth and that she was still in critical condition. So I went to Hojo to demand to know what he had done to her. He told me that he knew about the affair and that he was using her guilt to let him experiment on the baby. I couldn't understand why a man would experiment on his own child, so I asked him if the child was mine, and he said he didn't know, but that it didn't matter because 'Sephiroth,' as he called him, was going to become the most powerful human being on the Planet thanks to him. When I tried to stop him he killed me…and the rest is history."

"I think I understand you better now. When you love someone, you love them completely. And even when they betray and hurt you, all you care about is if they are happy."

"If I hadn't pursued Lucrecia even though I knew she was married, none of this would have happened. Hojo only did what he did because he was jealous. And if he hadn't done what he did, I would have been able to give Tifa the child she so desperately wanted."

"You can't possibly blame yourself for Tifa cheating on you!"

"No, I know that only Tifa is responsible for her actions. But I can't help but think 'what if'…What if I'd never been assigned to Nibelheim…What if I'd never met Lucrecia…What if I'd never been experimented on…but then if none of that had happened, I wouldn't be here today. And despite what's happened, I do love Tifa, and in my heart Valeria is my daughter."

"She is your daughter," Shera assured him taking his hand and squeezing it tight. "And she'll stay that way. You'll have no interference from me."

"Thank you, Shera. I know the lie is hard for you, and a burden you shouldn't have to bear. But it means a lot to our friendship that you would do something like that for me. And I'll never be able to repay you."

"I don't expect you to. I'm doing this because you're my friend, and I only want you to be happy. I can only imagine what it must feel like to think that everything you care about could be taken away at any moment. And I can't think of anyone who has been through as much as you, and deserves to have some happiness in his life more than you. And even as much as I think Cloud deserves to know the truth, I don't think anyone could love Valeria more than you. Not even her biological father. No matter what happens, I want you to know that _you_ are her real father." She squeezed his hands again in emphasis. "So I'll take your secret with me to the grave."

Vincent squeezed back, unable to say anything past the lump in his throat. They remained quiet together still holding hands for a few moments until Vincent abruptly cleared his throat and pulled away. "Could you please tell Tifa that I've gone out, if she wakes up before I get back?"

"Shall I tell her where you're going?" she asked with one eyebrow raised in curiosity.

"That will not be necessary. I should be back soon."

"All right."

"Then please excuse me while I take my leave of you."

Shera grinned wryly. "You're excused."

Vincent merely nodded, then turned silently and was quickly out the door and into the early morning air.

* * *

Startled awake out of a deep slumber by a somewhat muffled, but persistent tapping on the door, Cloud groaned and glanced at the clock on the small table next to the bed. It read, in annoyingly glaring red letters: 6:47 AM.

"Who the hell could be knocking at this hour in the morning?"

"Shall I get it?" Eunice asked, looking rumpled and blinking the sleep out of her eyes.

"Whoever it is, tell them to go away."

Eunice was dragging herself out of bed and searching for her dressing gown, when more knocks came at the door. "Just a minute!" she yelled as she managed to get the belt tied around her waist and stuffed her feet into a pair of complimentary slippers that had been provided by the hotel. She ran a few fingers through her hair to try to tame the ruffled auburn locks, and then opened the door just as the hand on the other side of the door began to rap again.

"Yes, what is it?" she asked haggardly.

"I'm very sorry. Perhaps I've made a mistake. Is this Cloud Strife's room?"

As soon as Cloud heard the distinct deep tones of the voice at the door his half-closed eyes snapped open and he sat up quickly, and then jumped out of bed. Hastily putting on the pair of shorts that he had haphazardly discarded on the floor earlier, he stepped up behind Eunice to glare at his unexpected guest.

"What are you doing here, Valentine?"

Eunice gasped in shock.

"I could ask the same question of you," Vincent returned with steely calm. "In fact, that is the reason I've come here. I wish to talk with you. In private," he added, with merely a nod in Eunice's direction, not even bothering to take his eyes off Cloud.

She shook her head. "Oh, no. I don't think so. The last time you were in the same room, you gave Cloud a black eye. I'd rather not give you the opportunity to do it again."

Turning to look at her for the first time since he locked eyes on Cloud, Vincent took in her worried green eyes, and forcibly let out a long calming breath. Opening his eyes again, and with eerie politeness, he said, "Please forgive me, madam, for interrupting your sleep at such an early hour. But I have unresolved issues with Mr. Strife, and we need to talk. I promise that I will not renew my earlier efforts to rearrange his face with my fists."

At the seeming earnestness of his unexpected speech, Eunice burst into laughter. "I've never heard someone so angry use such pretty words." Glancing at Cloud, who still looked like he wanted to use his lightning materia on Vincent, she took a step back and put her hand on his shoulder. "Whaddya say, Cloud? Should we trust him to keep his word? And if he does just want to talk, will you try not to retaliate? It's apparent that you have a lot to say to one another. But I'd rather it didn't deteriorate into fisticuffs."

Without taking his eyes off Vincent, Cloud gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "I think I can control myself long enough to hear him out."

"All right," she responded glancing back at Vincent who seemed to have relaxed if only an infinitesimally small fraction. "I'll just go and get dressed, and then see what I can find for breakfast."

Eunice opened the door wider to allow Vincent to step inside and gestured for him to take a seat in one of the chairs next to the window, but he refused, instead choosing to remain standing to peer down his perfectly straight nose at Cloud. Neither man spoke as Eunice self-consciously began to pick up some of the items of clothing and random toiletries that had been scattered around the room. Then she quickly grabbed some clothes from her suitcase and went to the in-suite bathroom to change. When she emerged a few minutes later, neither man had seemed to have moved a muscle. She walked over to Cloud and kissed him on the cheek in goodbye. "You two play nice, all right?" she demanded, jokingly. And then she left.

As soon as she was out the door Cloud spoke up. "I'm listening now. What did you come here to say?"

"I came to apologize." Vincent almost choked on the words, but he knew they were necessary if he was going to get Strife to agree to what he really wanted.

"Oh?" Cloud questioned, lifting an eyebrow his only encouragement to continue.

"I should not have assaulted you in front of my daughter."

"But it would have been all right if your daughter hadn't been there? Is that what you mean?" Cloud retorted sardonically.

Vincent grimaced. "That's not what I meant. Are you going to make me say it again?"

"All right, Vincent. Let's say I believe you. Is that all?"

"No."

"I didn't think so. Have at it then."

"I also came to make a request."

"Why am I not surprised? What do you want?"

"I want you to leave town and never come back. Don't try to contact Tifa, Yuffie, Cid, or Shera in any way. And definitely stay away from my daughter.

Cloud let out a low whistle at that and nearly laughed. "You don't ask for much, do you? Why should I do that?"

"Because the last time you came back, you tried to steal my wife and almost broke up our marriage. I'd rather not give you the opportunity to do it again."

Cloud scratched the back of his head in stunned silence. Then he gasped in understanding. "You're afraid that Tifa will choose me over you." Vincent didn't respond, but he became infinitesimally stiller, like prey caught out in the open in the crosshairs of a fierce predator. And Cloud knew the truth. He shook his head furiously in denial. "But she chose you over me! I begged her to forgive me, but she didn't. She told me it was a mistake and she went home to you!"

"But only after you _fucked_ her," Vincent replied with a deadly chill in his voice. "You fucked my wife and now you want to pretend like nothing happened."

Cloud scratched the back of his head, and opened and closed his mouth soundlessly as if he had no idea what to say to that. "Well, when you put it that way…it does sound kind of bad."

"Then you can see why I would be concerned about your sudden appearance?"

"Yeah, but that's not the reason why I came here! Honestly, I just wanted to see everyone, and introduce them to my new girlfriend."

"Why? What good would that do, Cloud? You've been gone for six years. Why would you care now, all of a sudden, to see the people you couldn't even be bothered to say goodbye to, or leave a note for, the last time you can flying through town on your bike? If you really cared about anyone, if you cared about Tifa, you would go away and never come back. Isn't that what she asked you to do?" Vincent asked pointedly.

With an audible swallow, Cloud nodded.

"Then I can only conclude that you must be here for some reason. And if it's not with the intention of stealing my wife, then you should be easily persuaded that leaving is in the best interests of everyone involved."

"But how can I be sure that's what Tifa really wants? What are you so afraid of Valentine?"

_I'm afraid that you'll take my daughter, you miserable bastard_, Vincent thought grimly. "I'm even willing to offer you monetary compensation."

That was completely unexpected. Cloud wasn't sure how to react to that. He never in a million years would have thought that Vincent would be so desperate to get rid of him. But he could use the money. Years on the road doing odd jobs here and there hadn't given him a lot of cash, and he didn't want to keep mooching off Eunice. "How much are we talking about?" Cloud asked mercenarily.

Vincent took the pen on the table and scribbled a figure on the accompanying notepad. Cloud whistled under his breath at the number. "You would give me all that just to get out of your hair?"

"You would of course have to sign a document saying that if you breach our agreement then all monies would be returned to me, plus interest."

"Is that even legal?"

"I could have the contract written up by tomorrow."

"And if I refuse?"

Vincent smiled grimly. "I get rid of you the hard way."

"Is that a threat?" Cloud frowned.

"It's a promise."

"I get the picture, Valentine. And I suppose if I were in your place I'd want the same thing."

"So then you'll leave?"

Cloud nodded slowly. "If that's what you want, then I guess I owe it to you. You know, I never thought about the consequences of my actions, I was just so consumed with my own desires, I never thought about what it might do to Tifa…or you…and you used to be my friend, and I shouldn't have done it. And I'm sorry about that."

Vincent was surprised at how relieved he felt when he heard those words. And he almost felt guilty for the huge lie he was perpetuating by not confessing the truth, especially since Cloud was being so honest and apologetic. Almost. But he was determined to protect his family at any cost. His soul was already tainted with the sins of his past, what was one more?

Vincent merely nodded in acceptance, and then stood up to leave. But before Vincent could open the door Cloud spoke again.

"Could you tell Tifa I'm sorry and I won't bother her or you again?"

Vincent turned to look at the blond ex-SOLDIER one last time, and noticed the dejected slump to his shoulders. Giving in to his pity for the man, he agreed. "Yes, I'll tell her."

"Thanks," Cloud replied. And then Vincent left the room, thinking that he would never have to see or think about the man ever again, and finally beginning to feel the weight that had been bearing down on him ever since Cloud had returned to their lives, slowly slip away so that he could breathe easier.


	15. Just Like Her Mother

A/N: This chapter has a bit of a cliffhanger. Hopefully this will push it past the 100 review mark ^_~

* * *

**Chapter 15: Just Like Her Mother**

In a state half between slumber and wakefulness, Tifa reached out for the man who had always protected her, and encountered only cold sheets. Sensing that something wasn't quite right, she blearily opened her eyes to seek out the one she had instinctively longed for, expecting him to be there for her like he always had been. But she could make out no signs of him in the bedroom, no water running in the adjoining bathroom to indicate his presence there-in, and no light from the walk-in closet either. He was just gone.

She sat up immediately, and called out to him, just to double check that he wasn't hiding somewhere, but was greeted by silence. Her eyes darted to the corner where he had dumped his duffle bag the evening before, and was alarmed to see that it was missing. Had he changed his mind, and decided to leave anyway? Even though Vincent had made love to her roughly, possessively, she was afraid that it hadn't been enough to reassure him that it would be better for him to stay. What had she been thinking? Of course sex wasn't a good enough reason to stay! She should have talked to him more, convinced him how devastated she would be if he left, and if that didn't work, remind him that he was the only father that Valeria had ever known and their daughter would be heartbroken if he left. Even if he didn't stay for her, which she had no right to expect him to, he just had to stay for his daughter.

Beginning to panic, Tifa ran into the closet to throw some clothes on, but tripped over something lying on the floor. Turning on the light, she discovered the missing duffle bag, and was immediately flooded with relief. He wasn't gone! He had just moved the bag, no doubt with the intention of putting everything back later. Thinking that there was no reason to wait any longer, she decided to put his things back herself. Smiling at how silly she was to think he would just leave without telling her, without even a note, she reached into his bag and started putting things away. He had only packed a few shirts, and some trousers, and underwear and socks, but in a side pocket she found one of Valeria's old baby shoes. Its twin had gone missing long ago. The sight of that little booty brought tears to Tifa's eyes. She regretted all the pain that she had caused him, and wished that they could go back to that time when Valeria was little and they had been so happy. Even to just a week ago, before Cloud had come back and threatened to destroy everything they held dear, would have made her happy. But she knew that things had changed irrevocably.

After she put his clothes away, she got dressed herself, and went downstairs to see if she could find Vincent there. She found Shera rooting around in the kitchen. "Good morning," she smiled warily.

Shera merely nodded.

"Have you seen Vincent?"

"He asked me to tell you that he would be back soon."

"Oh, thanks for telling me." Noticing that she still had her hand in a drawer, Tifa asked, "Is there anything I can help you find?"

"Yeah, I was just looking for a skillet. I was planning on making pancakes."

"Oh, don't bother! You're a guest in my house. I'd be happy to make pancakes for everyone."

Shera reluctantly closed the drawer. "All right. Thanks." Then folding her hands demurely, she asked, "Is there anything I can do to help, at least?"

"Umm…sure. You can make the batter." Tifa grabbed a big bowl and set it on the counter. Shera opened the refrigerator for some eggs and milk. The two women worked in companionable silence for a while.

"Look, I'd like to apologize—"

"I'm sorry about last night—" they both said at the same time. Then they both laughed self-consciously.

"No, you go first," Shera insisted.

"I'm sorry for getting angry with you. I know that I've asked an awful lot of you by keeping my paternity secret, and I had no right to."

"I didn't do it for you."

"I know, but I still appreciate it. Did Vincent talk to you about his decision?"

"Yes, he did. That's why I feel like I should apologize to you. I may not agree with your choices, but they're yours to make. And even though it seems like it's really selfish, I know that deep down you do really want what's best for Vincent and Valeria, and that's what I want, too. So I'd like to propose a truce. Whether we like it or not, we're going to be in each other's lives because of our husbands, and our daughters. And it will be better for everyone involved if we try to behave civil with each other."

"I agree. And I think for the most part we have. But yesterday was pretty extraordinary. Who would have thought Cloud would come back after all this time?"

"I suppose you're right. We've done it before, and we can do it again."

"Exactly. Now let's get these pancakes started."

* * *

Valeria had gone to sleep with thoughts of chocobos dancing in her head, and had awoken with one thought: _I wanna ride my chocobo again!_

She shot up and immediately threw her blankets off in a rush to get to her fluffy yellow friend. She ran to the door and had even put her hand on the knob when she suddenly remembered her friend and turned back to wake her up.

"Maddie! Maddie, wake up!" she yelled, shaking her still sleeping friend.

"Wha—what's the matter?" Maddie asked, blinking her eyes slowly. A small fist came up to rub sand filled eyes, and her tiny mouth opened in a yawn.

"Doncha wanna ride on my chocobo?" Valeria queried.

"Mm-hmm." She nodded. Then she laboriously threw one leg out of the bed, but then stopped in a languorous stupor, seemingly forgetting her purpose.

"Come on sleepy-head!" Valeria urged, grabbing Maddie's hand and half pulled, half dragged the older girl out of bed.

"I'm up! I'm up!" Maddie yelled plaintively as she pulled her hands from Valeria's grasp.

"Good! Let's go!" Without another glance at her friend, Valeria turned and darted out the door, running to her parents' room.

She turned the knob, and finding that it was unlocked, she ran into the room shouting, "Mommy! Daddy! Can I ride my chocobo again?" But there was no one there.

Unphased, she ran down the stairs and into the kitchen where she was sure her mother would be, just as she always was in the mornings. And there she was, talking to her Auntie Shera and making chocobo pancakes—her favorite. _Yum!_

"Mommy! Mommy! Can I ride my chocobo?"

"Of course you can, sweetie! You've just got to eat breakfast first and brush your teeth!"

"Do I gotta comb my hair, too?" Valeria questioned with a grimace of distaste. She hated combing her hair. It was so long and messy!

"Yes, you do. But I'll help you. Now where's Maddie? Wake her up and tell her breakfast is ready."

"No, I'll go get her." Auntie Shera stopped Valeria from leaving the table with a wave of her hand. "I swear, that girl is as slow as molasses in the morning, and she always has been!"

Vallie and her mommy both laughed at that. Then she grabbed the pancake that had been deposited on the plate in front of her and bit off the head. She noisily ate the rest, hardly taking the time to chew. "All done!" she told her mother, opening her mouth wide to emphasize the fact. "Now can I go ride my chocobo?"

Her mother rolled her eyes in mock frustration. "Not until you brush your teeth first!"

"I'm going!" And in a flash, she was off to the bathroom. She grabbed the stool and pushed it in front of the sink, then climbed on top so she could reach her toothbrush and toothpaste. She managed to squirt some onto the brush when her mother came in to monitor her progress. She began brushing away in a haphazard manner until her mother chastised her to make sure to get her back teeth and scrub her tongue. Then she spit and grabbed the cup of water her mother had filled for her and rinsed again. She opened her moth wide for an inspection, and her mother smiled with satisfaction. "You're good to go!"

"Yippee!" Vallie cried, and ran out the bathroom door, through the hallway, down the stairs, back through the kitchen, and out the backdoor where adventure awaited.

* * *

Tifa wasn't sure why she felt so anxious. Maybe it was just because Vincent was gone. Even though he'd told Shera that he would be back, a part of her was afraid that he wouldn't, and if he didn't, it would be what she deserved. Despite Shera's reassurances that Vincent had asked her to keep the secret because he wanted to continue to be Valeria's father, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was about to go terribly wrong.

It wasn't until she saw Valeria on the chocobo's back that her feeling of dread manifested in fear for her daughter. They had gotten the little chocobo for her birthday and had been assured that it was a gentle, kid-friendly bird. And last night at the party had proven how patient and long-suffering the animal was. Despite the constant petting of eager little hands, and once, when one of the older boys had tried to steal a tail feather in a dare, and had gotten a gentle nip in the butt in retaliation, the animal had been completely tame. But she knew Valeria had become obsessed, that one ride wouldn't be enough, and that the animal might get tired of its slight burden constantly kicking it to go faster and jump higher.

Thinking that Valeria had had enough for the moment, Tifa called down to her daughter, urging her to give the poor creature a break for a little while.

"Can't I do one more jump? Puh-leez!" Valeria whined.

Helpless against those big pleading eyes, Tifa smiled and gave in. What harm could one last jump be? "All right. You can do one more jump. But that's it!" Tifa said firmly.

"Ok! Just one more! And can I raise the bar higher?"

"No, I don't think so. That's high enough. You know you can't practice the higher jumps until your daddy or I have practiced with you first."

"But, mommy, I'm really good. Let me show you!"

Before Tifa could stop her, Vallie had raised the bar, had gotten back on her chocobo and was heading back so she could get some speed to make her jump.

Tifa began to get angry then. "Valeria Valentine! I said no! If you don't get off that chocobo now, I'll make sure that you don't get to ride one again until your _next_ birthday!" Valeria was so headstrong. She knew what she wanted and she knew how to get it. She could charm anything out of her father. She reminded Tifa a lot of herself at that age. Why, she hadn't been that much older than Valeria was now when she had decided to run off to Mt. Nibel in search of her mother. She had been fearless, just like Valeria was now, and look how that had turned out… Tifa began to run as fast as she could across the yard.

But Valeria didn't pay her any mind. "Watch me, mommy. I can do it!"

Tifa just wasn't fast enough. She watched in horror as the poor little chocobo began to gallop towards the obstacle, but it didn't pick up enough speed, and its legs were just too short to carry it over the bar. It leapt just as Tifa managed to get to the bar, but it didn't clear the top and stumbled, sending the chocobo to its knees and Valeria straight over its head to land in a crumpled heap a few feet in front of it.

"Nooooooo!" she screamed in terror, and dropped to her knees at her daughter's side. She was unconscious and pale, and so still Tifa was afraid that her daughter—her baby—was dead. Afraid to touch her, but unable not to know the truth, she carefully felt for a pulse and was relieved when she touched fingers to her tiny neck and found it to be faint and irregular, but still beating. Then she noticed the blood pooling out from a gash in her side. She must have fallen on a rock.

Carefully she stabilized her daughter's neck in case she had injured her spine, and then began putting pressure on the wound all the while yelling for help. "Shera! Cid! Maddie! Anyone! Help me, please! Somebody call an ambulance!"

* * *

Vincent was leaving the hotel when his phone began to ring. Retrieving it from the back pocket of his trousers, he answered, "Hello?"

"Vincent!" Cid's panicked voice instantly alerted him that something was wrong. "It's Vallie. There's been an accident." Vincent felt his blood run cold at the words. They were the worst things a parent could hear.

"What happened—no, where is she? I'm on my way."

"Midgar Memorial Hospital."

"How is Tifa? Is she all right?"

"She's fine. Physically. But…"

"I'll be right there." Then he hung up and broke into a run. He cursed the beautiful day that had induced him to walk that day instead of take his chocobo. He had wanted the extra time to think, but now it would cost him the time to get back to the house first. He managed to make it back in half the time without even really breaking a sweat, but was startled to find that Valeria's little chocobo wasn't in her stable. And then he knew what had happened. He heard weak warbling in the backyard and saw the poor creature in a crumpled heap. It had broken one of its legs.

Vincent tried to rationalize his actions as the humane thing to do. He told himself as he walked to the gun cabinet where he kept all his firearms under lock and key so that Valeria could never come to harm from them that even though veterinarian medicine had improved a lot in the past 40 years, the creature would always be in pain no matter what treatment it got. As he took down the Death Penalty and a box of cartridges, he told himself that a lame chocobo was of no use and would only cost more money and use up more resources than it was worth. As he loaded the weapon, he told himself that if Valeria was lucky enough to survive her accident, she would probably be too traumatized to ever want to ride again, and he would be too scared and protective to let her. But as he raised the weapon and took aim at its heart, he knew that the real reason why he was doing it was because he wanted to kill it. Because he was irrationally angry that it had almost killed his daughter. Because after he had swallowed his pride and gone to the man who could ruin his happiness and practically begged him to leave and never come back, this poor pathetic creature threatened to do the same, and he was angry. So angry that he could feel the demons inside of him scrambling in his brain for release. They were thirsty for blood, and he would give it to them. So he pulled the trigger. Blood splattered on his face and across his torso and arms, but he merely lifted a hand to wipe it off and smear it across his shirt.

He didn't bother to waste any more time with a burial for the bird. He ran back to the stable, locked the Death Penalty back into the cabinet, and quickly mounted the chocobo that he had aptly named Zeus. It was quick as lightening and his powerful legs got him to the hospital in record time.

He ran to the emergency room, but paused when a feeling of déjà vu overwhelmed his senses. His gaze fell upon Cid, Shera, Madison, and Tifa. Tifa was crying, her face puffy and blotched, but she launched herself at him when she noticed him standing at doors. "Where is she?" he asked.

"She's in surgery. The doctors told me they're doing everything they can." Then Tifa took a step back noticing the blood smeared across his face and shirt. "What happened to you?"

"I killed it," he answered simply.

Tifa's eyes widened in horror, but then she simply nodded. "So then you know what happened."

"I could guess. The chocobo had a broken leg, so I put it out of its misery." No further explanation was necessary. "How bad are Valeria's injuries?"

"As far as I can tell, she's sustained a concussion, and has lost a lot of blood from a gash on her side, but that's all I know. The doctor's said they would keep me updated." More tears spilled from Tifa's eyes. "But that was about half an hour ago. I have no idea how my baby is now."

Vincent pulled Tifa into his arms, trying to comfort her even though he felt the same desperate fear. To know that his child was injured and there was nothing he could do, that was the worst feeling Vincent had ever felt.

Then a doctor wearing full surgical gear came out of the operating room, a grave look on his face. "Mr. and Mrs. Valentine? Are you Valeria's parents?" When they nodded, he continued, "We were able to repair a lot of the damage using cure spells, but Valeria has lost a lot of blood and as you know, cure spells don't replace blood loss, so we needed to give her a blood transfusion. However, there were some complications."

"What kind of complications?" Whether he or Tifa had asked that question, he could not tell. They were both thinking the same thing and fearing the worst.

"It's her blood type. We've seen similar cases before. It's been infused with mako. If either of you have ever used mako, then she got it from you. If we could just get a sample of your blood and test that the blood types match, then it will be much better if we transfuse from you. Otherwise we'll have to find another donor, and I'm not sure we have the time."

The blood drained from Tifa's face. "I've never used mako in my life."

The doctor turned hopeful eyes to Vincent. "Then it will have to be from you. As long as you're the same blood type."

Vincent shook his head. "I'm not her father." It was the first time he had admitted it out loud since before she was born. He'd always remembered the fact, sometimes it was an expression on her face, or the tilt to her head, but there was always some reminder that she wasn't his. He never let it bother him, but now the idea that it wasn't his blood that would save her life made him feel desperately inadequate and useless.

The doctor turned embarrassed eyes to Tifa. "Is the father available?"

Tifa shook her head, her expression filled with despair. "He's not in the picture. He doesn't even know he has a daughter."

"Is there any way you could get in contact with him? If he's nearby, his blood would be ideal. If not, I'm afraid we don't have any of that blood on hand, and I'm not sure how long it would take to find someone…"

"I have no idea where he is!" Tifa cried.

"I do."

Tifa's head snapped to Vincent's face, an expression of disbelief written on her pale features. "You do?"

"Yes, he's still in Kalm. I will…go to him now."

"Vincent, please…" her sentence trailed off. She wasn't sure what she wanted him to do. She would do anything to save her child's life. She would lie, cheat, and steal. But could she have Vincent simply ask for what they needed, and in the process let out the secret she had worked so hard to keep for his sake. "Go quickly," she finally let out. She knew what it would cost him, but she knew that he was doing it without a second's thought to his own sacrifice because he would do anything for their daughter. His daughter.

He took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze of reassurance. "Don't worry," he seemed to say. "It will all work out. I'll bring Cloud, he'll save our daughter's life and then he'll simply disappear." Somehow, Tifa didn't think it would be as simple as that. Then he was running out the door.

* * *

After the fifth time his phone went to voicemail, Cloud finally decided to pick it up. He had been in a foul mood ever since his conversation with Vincent and hadn't wanted to talk to anyone, including Eunice. He still had this niggling feeling that Vincent was hiding something, and he hated the thought that he was practically being banished. Tifa had been his friend first, they shared a history that Vincent would never be able to understand, and she was the key to his past. But he knew that Vincent had made a good argument. He had had his chance with Tifa and had blown it, and even if their friendship could be repaired, Tifa didn't want it. It would be best if he just left.

That was why he was surprised to see that all five phone calls were from Vincent. It must have been pretty urgent for him to make so many calls one after another. The phone started to ring again as he held it in his hand.

"Hello?"

"There's been an accident," Vincent began without any preliminaries. "I need you to come to Midgar Memorial Hospital right away."

"What? Why?"

"I'll explain when I get there."

"At least tell me if it's about Tifa."

"No."

"'No' you won't, or 'no' it's not about Tifa?"

"I'd rather not do this over the phone," Vincent prevaricated.

"Listen. You either tell me what this is about right now, or I won't do anything you say. I've already done you one favor today. And I've had it just about up to here with you!"

Vincent paused as though the very action of answering pained him. "It's about Valeria."

"What? I still don't understand."

"Valeria's been in an accident and she needs a blood transfusion."

"What does that have to do with me?"

"We believe that you might be a match."

"But how is that possible? What am I missing here, Vincent?" Cloud scratched the back of his head in confusion. "Unless…"

"You're her father, Cloud."

* * *

A/N: So I did it again...In my other story I wrote that Vincent hated chocobos because he was a city boy and he thought they smelled. I don't think this Vincent particularly hates chocobos, but now he's killed two... 0_o Anyway, let me know what you think! And also, just because I'm curious, if you could take a minute to answer the poll on my profile, I'd appreciate it. Thanks!

P.S. This chapter title and the events therein were somewhat inspired by a movie. Can you guess which one it is? :)


	16. Who She Needs

A/N: 100 reviews! Thanks so much to everyone who has taken the time to leave me a review! I really appreciate it :) And thanks to those of you who have answered my poll. If you haven't done it yet, please go to my profile page and vote. I'm really interested in the results.

**Chapter 16: Who She Needs**

"Are you still there, Cloud?"

In the minutes after Vincent had revealed the secret, Cloud had gone completely silent. He had a kid, a daughter. He should have known. The clues had been there right in front of him. The reason why Tifa had told Vincent about their affair, the reason for Vincent's anger, and the reason why he had tried to buy Cloud's promise not to come near them again. And the worst part was, he wouldn't have ever found out the truth if she hadn't gotten hurt and needed his help. A billion questions went through his head. What was her favorite color? Her favorite food? Did she hate bananas like he did? Did she cry a lot when she was a baby? What had been her first words? How old had she been when she had taken her first steps? These were all questions a father should know the answer to. But at the moment he didn't have time to ponder them. She needed him. The answers would have to come later.

"What do you need me to do?" he finally asked.

"I'll be there in approximately eight minutes. What kind of vehicle are you driving?"

"I've still got my Fenrir."

"Then you will have to follow me back to the hospital. I'm on chocobo-back."

"OK. I'll be waiting for you outside." Then he hung up the phone.

He paused to compose himself after a flood of emotions threatened to overwhelm him. He couldn't decide which feeling held domain over his mind; he was angry over being lied to for five years, but also guilty because how much of that had been his fault? He could have come back long ago. If he hadn't been wallowing in self-pity for so long he could have come back sooner. He had to believe that if he'd come back before Valeria was born, Tifa would have told him the truth, wouldn't she have? But what kind of father would he have been? He had been pretty messed up then. Perhaps it was better that Vincent had stepped in, and given his child the kind of stability that any child deserved. But now he would never know because neither of them had given him a chance, and as messed up and crazy as he had been, he deserved to know the truth. What if knowing he had a child could have saved him? What if knowing there was a tiny human that was out there, dependent on him, could have brought him back from the edge? Tifa and Vincent had stolen that from him, and he would have a hard time forgiving them for that. But what if he screwed up? He had been a failure for most of his life. If he couldn't have cut it as a SOLDIER, what made him think he could be a good father, a job that seemed infinitesimally scarier? He had never known his father. He'd never had a good example of what a father should be. Fuck he was scared. How could he have a daughter? And a sick one, that needed him, at that. What if she died before he even got a chance to know her? That was the scariest question of all.

In his anxiety to get moving he grabbed his keys and almost headed out the door before he remembered Eunice, who had decided to go shopping after she'd come back from breakfast and had found Cloud brooding. Shit. He hadn't even told her about his earlier conversation with Vincent, how could he tell her about this? So he opted for leaving a note. He knew that she wouldn't be happy when she found it, but he didn't think he could deal with explaining things to her on top of everything else.

Then he went to the hotel parking lot where his motorcycle was parked, and decided to move it to the front entrance so they could get going as soon as Vincent arrived.

At exactly the time he said he would be there, Vincent came galloping on chocobo-back, and merely nodded in acknowledgement before turning the bird in a tight circle and simply galloping off in the direction he had just come from. Cloud followed. His bike could have easily overtaken the swift bird, but even though he had a general idea of where the hospital lay, it had been five years since he'd been in the city, so he decided to just follow. They made it to the hospital in good time. Being on chocobo and bike had allowed them to take a few shortcuts through alleyways that would have been impossible for a bigger vehicle to take. And then they were walking inside.

Cloud immediately found Tifa sitting in the waiting room with Cid and Shera. He was shocked at the mixed feelings just the sight of her evoked. That she looked like she had gone through hell and back, brought back those protective feelings he had always felt for her, but knowing that she had lied to him and betrayed him, made him feel angry as well. He had to hold himself back from just walking up to her, grabbing her and shaking her, all the while demanding to know why she had kept such a secret from him. But he knew why. And the important thing at the moment was his daughter.

He walked up to her slowly, Vincent at his heels, unsure of what he should do or say. He was the victim here, though, so why did he suddenly feel like an intruder on such an intimate family affair?

She couldn't look him in the eye, so she turned to Vincent. "Did you tell him…?"

Vincent nodded, but Cloud spoke. "I know."

"Then you'll do it?"

"I'm here, aren't I?"

"I'm so grateful! I can never repay you—"

"Let's just get this thing done, shall we?"

"Yes, of course." She turned around and ran to the nurses' station, who then paged the doctor. He came out almost immediately.

"All right, then. Who's the father?" he asked, his gaze quickly scanning the gathered party.

"I am." Cloud stepped up.

"That's good. Now let's get you tested. If you could just follow me, please?" Cloud did as he was behest, a feeling of intense nervousness filling him as the doors behind him closed shut, separating him from the group outside and one step closer to his daughter inside.

* * *

Tifa sat alone in the waiting room, unable to leave for fear that the moment she did the doctors would come out and she wouldn't be there. They'd finally convinced Cid and Shera to take Madison back to their home and wait for news there. Madison was beginning to get antsy, and Vincent asked Cid to take care of the chocobo for him. Vincent had gone to get her a cup of coffee.

"What happened to Cloud? Is he all right?" A pair of green eyes looked imploringly down at Tifa, as she sat numbly, trying to be patient as she waited for news of her daughter. She looked up to see what seemed like a familiar face. Wavy brown hair framed a heart-shaped face filled with a worried expression. There was no need to guess who it was. It must be Cloud's girlfriend.

"Didn't he tell you?" Tifa asked, nonplussed.

"All I got was a note that said he'd gone to Midgar Memorial. I rushed here as soon as I got it. So could someone please tell me what's going on?"

"I think it's something that you'd better hear from Cloud himself."

"Well, where is he?"

"He's donating blood." He had been a match. Thanks be to the gods.

"Then he's okay?"

"Yes, he's fine."

"Thank goodness! But I ought to wring his neck for scaring me like this."

"I suppose he didn't have time to tell you, or he would have I'm sure," Tifa tried to reassure her.

"You're Tifa, right?" Green eyes narrowed in sudden appraisal.

"Yes, that's right."

"Then you can tell me what your husband said to Cloud earlier that had him so upset."

"Well, yes, I could, but like I said, I think it would be better if you heard it from Cloud."

"Cloud has this nasty habit of keeping things bottled up inside. I'd rather hear it from you. Besides, it might give me more ammunition when I grill him about it later."

Tifa supposed the woman had a right to know. And it's not like it was a big secret anymore. "You'd better sit down."

"Uh-oh, I don't like the sound of this at all," she said taking the chair across from Tifa.

"It's not very easy for me to say. In fact, you'll be the first person I've told in over five years."

"Go on."

"My daughter fell off her chocobo this morning. She lost a lot of blood and needed a blood transfusion. I wasn't a match for her…"

"Okay," Eunice prompted her to continue.

"I wasn't a match for her, but her father is…" Tifa felt tears prick her eyes again at the relief she'd felt when the doctor had told her that Cloud was an exact match.

"Her father?" Eunice's eyes widened in shock. "You mean Cloud is your daughter's father?"

Tifa nodded, head bowed in shame.

"And he just found out today?"

Again Tifa nodded.

"No wonder he's been such a head case today! Finding out you've got a five-year-old daughter that had been kept a secret from you is bound to do that." Eunice laughed.

Tifa looked up at Eunice, confused by her reaction. "Aren't you mad at me on Cloud's behalf?"

Eunice shook her head, green eyes filled with compassion. "It's not my place. Besides, from what I know about what happened, I'm not sure that I wouldn't have done the same."

"You are very kind."

"But you were wrong, you know," Eunice added. "Whatever might have happened between you before, Cloud deserved to know the truth. He would have done right by you and the baby."

"I didn't do it because I didn't think he would be a good father. I mean, not really. He could be absent and distant, but he was good with kids. Marlene loved him." And he'd even sort of taken care of a kid, an orphan that he'd found at Aeris' church. He'd brought him food and talked to him, and when he got sick, he'd taken him to the hospital, and stayed by his side the whole time until he'd taken his last breath. Something about watching him care for that boy had brought them closer together for a while, but then when he'd died he'd started getting more and more distant. She supposed he'd felt like he'd let down Aeris again. She knew that he'd believed that he had found him in that church for a reason.

"Then why did you do it?" Eunice asked.

"I did it for Vincent. He…can't have children. So when I got pregnant, I knew it was our only chance."

"You don't mean to tell me you got pregnant on purpose?"

"No! It was a complete accident. But when it happened, I was ultimately grateful."

"I see. I didn't know this before. About Vincent, I mean."

"You're very forgiving…" Tifa started. But then she paused, uncertain of how to continue. "Err…do you think that Cloud will ever forgive me?"

"I don't know. You'll have to ask him about that."

Before they could continue their conversation, Vincent returned holding a coffee cup for Tifa. If he was surprised to see Eunice there, he didn't show it. He merely nodded in acknowledgment of her presence and sat down beside Tifa.

"Have you heard any news?" he asked Tifa.

She shook her head. "No, but the doctor should be back soon. With Cloud." They waited silently, Tifa too caught up in her own thoughts, and Vincent unwilling to express his. Eunice seemed to be content to just sit there, and after a while her eyes closed as if in slumber.

Perhaps ten or fifteen minutes went by as Tifa sipped her coffee and Vincent watched the traffic in the waiting room. Nurses, doctors, and patients came by to and fro, and there were various beeps and buzzes coming from the medical devices in the rooms. How he hated hospitals. The sounds, the smells, the glaring lights…it all reminded him of being in the laboratory with Hojo. His throat tightened and his head began to ache, but he refused to leave. His daughter needed him. Tifa needed him.

Finally, the doctor came out with Cloud in tow.

Tifa immediately jumped up, and Eunice's eyes popped open as if she hadn't really been sleeping at all.

"Is she all right? How is Valeria?" Tifa asked.

"The blood transfusion went well and we've finished operating on her. She'll be moved to the recovery room very shortly."

"Thank the gods!" Tifa shouted, turning to Vincent to hug him tightly.

"Can we see her?" Vincent asked over her shoulder.

"Yes, you'll be able to see her when we move her into her room. But she probably won't regain consciousness for another hour or so."

"But she's all right? She'll make a full recovery?" Tifa asked.

"We expect that she will make a full recovery in a matter of days. Because of the mako in her blood, we expect that she will heal quicker than usual."

"That's amazing!"

"We don't know a lot about the long term effects of mako, but despite its addictive and hallucinogenic qualities, it does seem to have some medical advantages as well. Your daughter is one lucky little girl."

"Thank you so much," Tifa responded, tears of relief in her eyes. She was so relieved that she didn't even care about the daggers Cloud was boring into her face with his angry eyes.

The doctor excused himself, leaving the four of them to stare awkwardly at each other, or at least Cloud, Tifa, and Vincent. Eunice didn't seem to be affected by the tension between the others. She walked up to Cloud and wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

"Tifa told me that you just saved the day."

He tore his gaze from Tifa just long enough to return the hug. "I guess you could say that."

"I'm very proud of you, Cloud," Eunice continued. "I know that you've had quite a shock today, but you seem to be handling it rather well. You managed not to kill Vincent earlier, and you rescued a little girl in the process."

"Thanks…I guess."

Tifa finally managed to call up enough courage to speak to Cloud. "I must thank you as well. You saved my daughter's life, and I could never repay you."

"You've said that before. But I can think of one thing you could do for me."

"What's that?" Tifa asked warily.

"We need to talk."

"Talk…?"

"In private."

Tifa's troubled eyes flew to Vincent, whose eyes were trained on Cloud's face studying him suspiciously. Finding his features an unreadable mask, her gaze returned to Cloud's face. "What? Now?"

"Yes, now."

"Can't it wait? Until after we've seen Valeria?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about."

With no way to gage what Vincent was thinking, Tifa merely agreed. "Okay. I'll talk with you now. I suppose it's the least that you deserve." Turning to Vincent she asked, "Will you stay here and wait until we get back?"

Vincent nodded.

Turning back to Cloud she told him, "I guess we can go to the hospital chapel." She supposed that if there were any place where two people could go to have a conversation in peace and quiet, that would be it.

Tifa was surprised when Eunice spoke up. "Are you sure this is the right time, Cloud? You seem pretty angry."

"I _am _angry." Cloud glared down at her.

But before Eunice could respond, Tifa interrupted. "It's okay. We're bound to have this discussion, and it won't be easy no matter when we do it. Might as well be today."

Eunice shrugged in Tifa's direction, as if to say, _It's your funeral._ Then she gave Cloud a gentle squeeze.

Tifa turned to Vincent, who remained stoically impassive. Then she turned back to Cloud. "Let's go."

They walked out of the waiting area, and following the signs along the corridor, eventually they found themselves in the hospital chapel.

Without wasting any more time, Tifa cut straight to the matter at hand. "What did you want to say?" she asked him.

"I want to see her."

Tifa shook her head. "I'm not sure if that's a good idea…"

"You fucking owe me! If I want to see her, you can't stop me."

"It's not that—" Tifa started.

But Cloud refused to let her continue to speak. "You stole my daughter from me! You weren't even going to tell me about her, ever! Instead you sent your lapdog to try to bribe me into never seeing you or her again!"

"What do you mean I sent my husband to bribe you? I never did that!"

"Don't lie to me again! You sent your husband just this morning! He woke me up at the asscrack of dawn demanding that I never see you or any of our other friends again. He distinctly told me that _you_ never wanted to see me again. Is that true or not?"

"It's true, Tifa reluctantly admitted. "I never wanted to see you again—" Cloud took a menacing step closer. "—but I _never_ asked him to bribe you."

"Stop lying to me!" Cloud grabbed Tifa by the arms and began to shake her. Her pale skin turned red where he held her, and he shook her so hard that her skulled seemed to rattle in her head. Then she pulled away from him, and slapped him.

"Don't you dare touch me again! Or I swear to Odin that I'll make sure that you _never_ see Valeria."

"I'll fight you for her. You can't deny me! I have rights too, you know. Rights that you've violated for the past five years."

"I'd like to see you try." Tifa laughed bitterly. "No court will ever give you custody. You're not married. Who knows what you do to get your money these days. And you're never around. I doubt you even have a place to call your own."

"We'll see about that. At least I'm not a lying whore who stepped out on her husband."

"This conversation is over!" Enraged, Tifa stomped out of the chapel. But as soon as the doors closed behind her, panic set in and she burst into tears. All of the things that she'd never wanted to happen were happening.


End file.
